Another Way To Love (LGBT)

XIX

The week to follow could only be described as utter hell.

Not only did I somehow have to convince Cooper that my feelings for him were real, but I was also struggling with the fact that I was noticing things. Things that I'd probably noticed in the back of my mind, but now they were at the front and killing me nice and slowly. Like how Cooper gnaws on his pencil during class when he's bored, or how his shirt slips and shows his collarbone sometimes, or how every time he smiles I have this sudden urge to kiss him and taste it.

And the worst part was, he didn't even know he was doing it. Or maybe he did, and he was punishing me. (Realistically, in the back of my mind, I knew Cooper wasn't like that, but it felt better to complain.)

I tried over and over again to convince Cooper I was telling the truth about loving him, but it became very apparent that words weren't going to do it.

Anybody could say they love someone, very few could show it.

But how do you show somebody something like that? In the movies there was always some big gesture, like a fancy date or performance, neither of which were really...us.

I wanted Cooper to understand my feelings in the most our way possible. Whatever that was.

"Monica, did you take my phone charger!?" I snapped as I stormed into the living room, finding my lovely (demonic) sister sitting on the couch, nose deep in a magazine.

"Uh-huh." she answered distantly.

I clicked my tongue. "Can I ask why?"

"My phone needed charging. I lost my charger. I encourage you to connect the rest of the dots on your own." She told me simply, not even glancing my way.

I silently screamed, pretending just for a moment that I was choking her from a distance, before heading to her room to search for the charger.

Her room was still as disgusting as always, but there it was, sitting on her mess of a nightstand plugged into her phone.

I took my charger back and tossed her phone under the bed. She could have fun looking for that later.

As I turned to leave, I stopped when I noticed the polaroid still on her wall. One of the few things that told me my sister really did love me and didn't just think of me as a pest.

It was weird to think of Monica being sentimental, but in a strange way it also made me feel closer to her. Like we shared a common ground.

That was when I got the idea. How I figured out what I needed to do to show Cooper how much I love him.

And it would probably kill me in the future to know I'd have Monica to thank for it, but if it meant reaching Cooper with my feelings, then maybe it was worth it.