Breaking down

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General pov
Both Beth and Viv got their call up's for international duty much to their delight and it was now time to break the news to their daughter. This was the part they hated knowing that this news would likely cause some distress and tears but no matter the outcome it had to be done. That evening started as a usual Meadema evening routine. Viv cooking dinner, Y/n showering and Beth chatting away too Viv in the kitchen.

"We have to tell her at some point vivi the longer we leave it the harder it will be for us all" Beth explained to Viv knowing full well that Viv was ignoring this topic for as long as possible. You see Viv can be the stricter one of the pair of them but that doesn't mean when it comes down to their daughter it is that way, you see y/n only has to produce puppy dog eyes long enough for Viv to buy into whatever idea she had but the one thing that Viv hated the most was seeing her daughter break down in tears. The first time they ever left their daughter for international duty 10 years ago still torturing her to this day. And ever since the news of their departure never went down too well.

Flashback
Viv pov
It was time to go the first time ever me and Beth had left our daughter for more than a night this time it was 2 weeks. 2 whole weeks! My taxi had just pulled up with Beth's swiftly behind, Beth's dad Rich was there ready for handover none of us quite knowing what y/n's reaction would be, we had tried explaining the process to her but with her only 2 it hadn't quite been understood. I bent down with Beth to where y/n was sat playing with her dolls, "right bug me and mummy are heading off now for work you be a good girl for grandad ok?  We will call you everyday, love you baby girl" I explained to her trying to make this a smooth sailing process. Y/n immediately latched on to myself and Beth crying saying she didn't want us to go, rich came over to help us trying to cohere the little girl to go with him and do a fun activity, but it didn't work, at this point she was screaming, crying getting herself worked up into a right old state. God does this little girl know how to pull on my heart strings, rich came over to us and gently tried pulling her off us to which somehow he managed to do avoiding the flailing arms and legs. Both me and Beth hurried out the door not wanting to make this worse than it was for either us or
y/n, as soon as I was out the door I just cried this was the part I hated the most, why couldn't I have a normal 9-5 job even though I would fully well hate every moment of it, it at least meant we would have less of these scenarios. I gave Beth one last big hug before we both made way to our own taxis ready for the week ahead.
End of flashback

"I know, I know but I just hate it, I know she will be fine but what if she isn't, you know what she's like when we aren't here." I wobble back  which earnt myself a hug from Beth, "i know babe I don't like it either but she will be ok with liv and Ben they will look after really well and she will be here at home." She replies soothing by uncertainties, I knew now was the right moment I needed to put on a strong face and tell y/n.

Y/n pov
"Y/n can you come downstairs for a moment please me and Mumma need to talk to you quickly" I heard mum shouting up the stairs, curious to what this could be about I hadn't done anything wrong, my tutor was really impressed with me and I've been doing all my assignments, hockey was going well and I'd gotten myself a nice small group of friends deciding to stop pondering the if's and but's I went down to go and find out what was going on. I came down the stairs to find my parents sat on the sofa with the TV on but the volume dropped down, my mum signals for me to come and sit in between them Mama grabs my hands and holds them in my lap and mum puts her arms around my shoulder. If i wasn't confused before I most certainly was now.

"Bug me and Mama just wanted to talk about international duty, as you know we where potentially getting call up's to this next window.."
As soon as mum said this i immediately knew where this conversation was going. "We got our call ups and I know maybe it wasn't quite what you wanted to hear, I know you don't like being away from us trust me neither do we and if we could take you with one of us we would but sadly we can't bug, we have tomorrow together and then we go the day after, Friday" so many emotions crawled around inside me anger, anger that they where going and leaving me. Sad, sad that I wouldn't see them for 3 weeks. Scared, scared of what would happen to me if they weren't here. Before I could even respond I tore my hands out of Muma's lap and ran up the stairs and straight into my room, slamming my bedroom door behind me before launching myself under the covers allowing myself to be vulnerable and let all the emotions crawl out.

It wasn't fair , why's it me, why am I the one who's parents have to take three week long work trips. The tears kept flowing they wouldn't stop no matter how many times I wiped them away they just kept cascading down my face, after what felt like forever but realistically was only 5 minutes a soft knock came at my door, "bug please can we come in we know your sad but can we just talk about it please." I couldn't do it, I couldn't face them not whilst I was like this, I know they are my mums and they wouldn't ever judge me but instead would only offer kind caring words, but somehow deep down I knew that by allowing them too see me like this would make them feel worse and that would be even more selfish then I'm being currently.

Hours passed and still I hadn't moved a muscle, I'd been shouted for dinner several times missed many texts and calls from my mums but still I couldn't, I couldn't go downstairs and see them and not cry again although they knew I struggle without them around I don't think they white understand too what extent, eventually the house went quiet only the soft murmurs of the TV could be heard. After lying in the same position for hours I reached over to my bed side table to grab my phone, only to switch it on and reveal a shed ton of messages.

Mum: bug we know your upset we won't talk about it anymore but maybe some dinner and cuddles might help? love you millions xxxx
Mumma: lieverd dinner is ready when you are I've left it on the side for you, come down when you want my arms need a bear hug love you always xxx
Leah: hey my favorite small person, what's occurring everything ok?
Poppy: did you ask your mums for insta?

Deciding not to reply to any of them I switch my phone back off and resume my position from earlier, after a considerable amount of time my door creaked open and my bed dipped from either side, 2 pairs of arms wrapped around me and kisses on the forehead seemed to follow, not much was said but we led like that for a bit longer until both of them wished me a goodnight and silently walked out. After what could only be recognized as mums snores echoing from her room allowed me to have some time to think, whether this was s good thing or not I don't know. But I myself didn't know what I needed to think about, I had the most loving parents who cared for me and loved me, I lived in a safe happy environment. God was I being selfish why couldn't I just be happy and supportive of my mums like they where to me I wouldn't blame them if they just didn't come back, once again at the thought of them not returning tears ferociously escaped my eyes and poured down my face, my breathing quickened, my chest tightened I was fully breaking down. I thought I could wait it out and eventually it would stop but after a short time it was evident that it wasn't stopping anytime soon and there was only going to be one thing that calmed that down.

Beth pov
The sound of our bedroom door sliding across our carpet pulled me out of my dream upon looking up my eyes where met with a sight I didn't like. Our daughter stood there with her bunny held tightly in her arms, dried tears staining her cheeks and her body shaking from the late night chill, I lept out of bed and rushed over too her pulling her fragile vulnerable body into a tight hug before carefully guiding her back over to our bed allowing her to get in first, she clambered into bed being careful not to wake Vivianne up she lay facing me with her head snuggled close tight to my chest. "I love you mum, I'm so sorry" the last hit broke my heart the fact she felt the need to apologize for her emotions pulled in the heartstrings. "I love you too baby girl more than you know, there is no need to apologize. I tell you what let's go back to sleep and I'll see what I can sort out tomorrow ok?" So that's what we did before long the Meadema house was silent.

A/n
Here it is finally a part I'm so sorry for it being late a lot has happened this past week but I'm hoping this made up for it slightly!
Gutted about the result today, do we think that the ball went over the line? Giving me World Cup dejavu
Also it seems like less and less people are starting to read this and like it, shall I leave this book or start another one?

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