I Need You

Part 18 - Rain

             

              I had grown weary of Mimi's constant whinging about George, and her tyrannical rule over the house ever since I'd taken up with him, so I officially moved out of my childhood home with her, for good.  I was no longer staying at The Harrisons' either, as it were almost as if Georgie was a bleedin' ghost. I barely saw hide nor hair of him, and would only occasionally hear him moving through the house; it seemed as though he was intentionally avoiding me, although I did nothing to provoke or upset him. I had a long and emotional talk with Louise and Harold, pulled a bit of money from my savings, and found myself a flat near The Jac; I needed some time and space to myself, (and I loved their coffee).
        Not even a week after I had gotten my own place, George had stopped by outside with a few of my things I had forgotten at his parents'..
   
      

         I'd never forget the words he said and how they hurt me..

       "Lovey,  please try to understand.  I only want the best for you.  You deserve more than me, a scruffy ted from Liverpool. I want better for you."
     "What if YOU'RE what I want?! I don't want better, I don't want some nancy boy that works for his father, some pussy trust fund baby, or anythin' like that. I want YOU, ya git!"
       "You've already been through so much Jeannie,  don't let me drag you down more. I love you, and I always will, but you have to let me go."
        "There's someone else,  isn't there George?  Someone more fit, with a nicer body, someone with a real future?"
         "Don't be ridiculous, Jean, there's only been you. I...    I  just can't stand seeing you reduced to this, when you could be so much more.  You're a fantastic artist,  and you've pushed everything to the side to follow me and my dream. It's time to focus on YOU now."

          
        By now, I couldn't see, hot tears stung my eyes, and I felt sick. I searched George's eyes, as he averted his gaze, and a single tear fell from his eye.
      "I love you, Georgie,  I love you more than anythin'. Please... please don't leave me. I need you!"
       George sighed, more tears raining down his already dampened face, but he said nothing more, turned, and walked away..

        Thank God for the almost constant rain in Liverpool. Maybe people wouldn't be able to tell that I'd been crying.  I had to go to work, although all I wanted to do was crawl in a hole and disappear.  I made it to NEMS after grabbing a cup of coffee to go at a diner. My boss, Brian, eyed me as I entered,  knowing something was wrong.
          "Jean? You alright, sweetheart? Meet me in my office,  okay? We'll have a little chat."
          I pulled off my Mac and threw my handbag under the counter,  taking a sip of my scalding hot coffee, immediately burning my tongue. 'Bloody hell,  what a shitty morning, and it's not even 9 am', I thought to myself.  I grabbed a handful of tissues and climbed the stairs to Brian's door, knocking softly.
         "Jean? Come on in, love. Take a seat."
     I sat down in a chair opposite his desk, head hanging low. I didn't want to look at him, or at anyone else for that matter. My heart was heavier than the rain-filled clouds soaking the streets outside.
         "Talk to me dear, I know something's wrong. I can see it on your face and in your eyes."
          "My boyfriend,  he - he broke up with me this morning,  and I dunno why. All I did was love him and support him, no matter what.  And he ended it, Brian." I sniffled,  sobs wracking my body once more.
        "Listen,  we're fully staffed this morning. How's about you take the day off, maybe spend some time with that brother of yours. He always seems to be able to make you laugh."
        "He's holed up in his bedroom with his bird.  But if you don't need me, I'll be off. Gimme a call if you get busy, alright?"
        He stood up from his desk, walking over to me, putting a hand on my shoulder.
         "Take a few days,  yeah? Get yourself sorted, maybe get some sleep.  Come back next Monday,  your job will be waiting for you."
          I stood up to go, and he held me tightly.
     "It'll be alright Jean, it just looks bleak now. You'll be okay. Maybe you'll find someone who treats you better. Go on now, love, go home, take it easy."
         He gave my hand a squeeze, and I left his office, walking down the stairs, out the storefront, and out into the rain. I didn't even bother to turn back for my Mac. I let the rain wash over me as I headed for The Grapes, intending to drink as much as I could before stumbling home.

  
        "Jeannie! Jeannie,  come 'ed!  Jeannie Lennon!"
        I turned to look behind me,  seeing Paul trying to flag me down. I stopped,  letting him catch up, as a mix of rain and tears ran down my face.
        " 'Ey there, Sunshine! Fancy some company?"
        "Sure, but don't call me Sunshine.  I'm not feelin' very sunny anymore, Paulie."
        "Ye alright, love? I never see you like this."

        He threw an arm around me,  holding me close to him under his umbrella,  even though I was already drenched.
        "George chucked me, Paul. Said he wanted better for me,  that I deserved more."
        "You're jokin'! I swore you two were headed for the altar in a few years! I'm sorry, luv. Come 'ed, let's get you home, yeah?"
       "Don't wanna. Everythin's still in boxes, and I'm in no mood to unpack." 
       "Come over to mine then. Da and Mike's gone, we'll have the place to ourselves.  I'll brew us each a cuppa, and we'll put on some old records,  whaddya say?"
       "Sure. Beats walkin' around in the rain. Let's go."
        "It'll be alright, Sunshine."
        "Paulie.."
        "I know what ya said, but you'll always be my Sunshine. Ye always brighten my day when I see your face."
       "You're bloody full of shite, Paul," I said with a smirk.
       "Fine, don't believe me, but it's true. Come on, it's like a monsoon out 'ere, my skin's soaked right through to the skin, and you look like you were out for a swim."
     
         My heart was broken, and I was shivering from the cold, English rain, and all I could think about was George, and how empty I felt without him..