Tell Me How; A TeacherxStudent WLW

It Hurts

I lay on the side of my bed. My blanket covers my bare body. I'm not exactly sure what just happened. It didn't last long. There was no aftercare. That shit hurt more than the actual activity. He kind of just up and left. This was at least 4 hours ago and I still lay here in shock. In anger. Embarrassment. Humiliation. Why did this even happen? Did I have a reason? Was I just horny?

I don't know who to call. School is still going. Kacy is at home. I grab my clothes off the floor right next to me and I sit up. Wincing from the pain. Mostly emotional. I put on my pants and shirt and I walk to my sister's room. I knock on the door, It's already open so I walk in. She's on the phone. With one of her friends, I assume. She looks at me and mouths 'What?' 

I don't say anything. I just look at her. My sister. She would never hurt me. Without saying goodbye, she hangs up and looks at me with concern. 

"Kass. What's wrong?" She asks. I stand in her doorway, the same expression is smudged across my face along with black streaks of mascara and messy lipstick. A tear escapes my eye and runs down my cheek. 

"Oh, baby." She says with a pout and walks up to me. Her arms are stretched open and I run to them. Together, we collapse on our knees. 

"It hurts." I hold her and cry into her shoulder. 

"Kass, tell me what happened." She pulls away and has a demanding tone. 

I nod and wipe my nose. "We had sex. And he walked out my door right when he finished. He didn't even say goodbye. He knew it was my first time." Kacy seemed surprised by what I said. 

"You guys really had sex? and he didn't take care of you?" She asks and wipes my tears. I nod again. 

"And it wasn't half as good as I expected. He was way too fast and only lasted 4 minutes." She laughs and hugs me again. 

"He doesn't deserve you. Leave him." She makes a determined face and smiles at me. 

"Maybe I should. It hurts too much." I pause. "Hey, what did you tell mom?" I slowly scooch away from her. 

"Nothing. Just that you were upset. She saw the redness of my cheek and had already assumed what happened." She shrugs and looks around her room. 

"Oh." I slowly start to stand up. "Did Aiden come in here, before he left?" I ask and stand up fully. She shakes her head and stands up too. I stare at her for another second. 

"Mhm." With that, I walk out and go back into my room. The thing between my sister and Aiden is such a blur. We've been close enough for her to tell me something like that our whole lives. We've also been close enough for her to never hurt me. But the way Aiden acted today, he clearly doesn't love me. There's someone else. Someone who was giving him sex when I wasn't because I was scared. So the whole time I thought he loved me and respected my boundaries, he was banging someone else.

I should call Mrs. Sanchez. I pick up my cell from my vanity and dial her number. Who gives a fuck if she's in class? Once it starts ringing, I put it to my ear. 

"Hello?" I hear that soft innocent voice. I feel more care from her mouth than I did from my own sister or boyfriend. 

"Mrs. Sanchez." I sigh in relief. "I'm sorry about the way I behaved today. Can I come in after school for help studying?" I chew on the inside of my lip, waiting for her answer. 

"Come on in, Kass. I have an empty schedule today." She says, I pull my lip between my teeth and sigh in contentment. 

"Thank you, Mrs Sanchez. I'll make up for taking your time." I smile and hang up the phone, butterflies swarm my stomach, it's almost unbearable. Shit. School's almost over. Gotta get ready. 

                                                                 *   *   *

I walk into my school building after blasting Untouchables by Korn on the way here. I make my way into her class, students are still leaving. But once it's empty, I walk to her desk and sit. 

"Hey," I whisper to her. "Hey." She smiles at me and gestures her eyes to the minifridge below her desk. 

"Would you like a water?" She opens it and I nod. "Sure. thanks. I've been parched all day." 

She chuckles, "Cottonmouth get to you?" Her eyebrow raises and she looks back at her computer. I completely forgot I told her about what I did today. Fucking shit. 

"That was obviously a joke." I roll my eyes and take a sip. 

"Whatever you say, Kass." She stays smiling and I smile back. 

"Okay, I need to vent," I say seriously, placing the bottle down. "It's personal." She looks away from her computer.

"Well, we've already crossed that line, haven't we?" She laughs quietly, I nod and smile. 

"I had sex for the first time with Aiden today, and he sucked. He left right after and he wasn't gentle at all. He only thought about himself. Which makes my suspicions about him and my sister even bigger." I cross my arms over my chest and lay back in my chair. 

"Oh my god, come here." She opens her arms and hugs me. At first, I'm surprised. But then I realize that if I was a dude, I'd be hard as shit right now. 

She pulls away and tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. Is this bitch about to kiss me right now?

"No one deserves that. Especially you." She says. Once again, I'm comforted more by her than I've ever been by people whom I need it from. She shows me she cares. I've never felt it before. It makes me want her even more.  I give in to my intrusive thoughts and lean in. Mrs. Sanchez turns away. Fucking fuck. 

"I'm sorry, Kass. We can't." She doesn't look at me. It feels like a stab in the fucking heart when she doesn't look at me. 

"No. You're right. I should go." She does nothing but nod. I was wrong. This shit hurts more than anything I have ever fucking experienced. It was humiliating. I stand up and run out of her class. 

Once I get to my car, I pull out my cell and dial my dealer's number. I just broke up with him when I got clean, But I'm at another all-time fucking low. 

"Hey, meet me at the spot?"