"So you're telling me that you like Nick Nelson? What's wrong with that? He's nice and good looking." Elle looks confused as the pair sit on her floor, drinking tea and talking.
Estella groans, her face between her hands. "That's part of the problem! Charlie likes him." She blurts out.
Elle's face is sympathetic as she sips her not too sweet tea. Unlike Estella, who put enough honey in hers to feed a colony of bees for a year.
"I can't like him. I won't do that to Charlie, he really likes Nick and I'm pretty sure Nick likes him back." Estella says in a quiet murmur.
"You can't help who you like, Stella. Besides you don't even know if Nick likes Charlie."
Estella looks up from her hands, her eyes filling up with tears. "I don't want to lose Charlie. Plus it's not like Nick would like me back. He couldn't when I'm this pathetic and ugly." Her voice breaks at the end.
"Estella. Whatever your mum tells you is not true and you know that. You deserve love, Stella." She says in a quiet voice, meeting Estella's eyes.
Elle had found out last year about Estella's Mum and Bill, she didn't know the full details but she knew enough to worry about Estella.
"I'm sorry... It's fine and I'm being rude." She wipes away the tears trailing down her face. "I'm sorry for coming here and completely blowing up. How's Higgs going?"
Elle searches Estella's eyes before saying. "I know you're trying to change the subject but I'll let you. It's going fine really. The teachers are a lot better and the girls are nice enough. I just miss you lot."
The two girls continue talking throughout the night, one worried for her friend, the other just needing assurance.
...
In the dark of her room, Estella began to pour out her feeling onto a mere piece of paper. The words flew out of her, just as her tears did.
Why couldn't she be loved? It felt like everyone who ever truly loved her had left. Soon Charlie would, once he found out how weak and pathetic she was. Then Nick would follow.
It seemed as though love was taunting her, holding it just out of her grasp. Just as it had with her Mum. Except her mother was weak and tried to join her father early. Leaving young Estella wondering when she would finally be enough. The answer? She never would.
...
(Next Saturday)
A/n: These are my thoughts about Estella's room. Low key my dream room lol
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
