My Deepest Scar (A Tragic Teenage Love)

Ch. 8 - It was a prank

"It's YOU."

"Are you joking?" he asked, perplexed.

 "Why would I?" I replied casually, as if my heart wasn't threatening to come out of my chest.

Calm down, you stupid little organ. You ain't helping my "cool" act.

"How...I mean... Why... Are you sure you're not trying to pull a prank on me?"

"I'm not lying. You can think whatever you want. And, I'm not the type of person who lies about their crushes. If I like someone, I admit it. Shy is the last thing I will ever be."

"Oh." He paused, probably trying to reject me in a humble way. While I knew he would reject me, him being thoughtful about it is appreciable. I would be disappointed if he said he liked me too because that would obviously be a lie. I'd noticed every single thing he did around me and I was a hundred percent sure he only saw me as a good friend.

Admitting my feelings was probably too rash but if we were going to be good friends, I needed to come clean sooner or later. Yeah, I could've been friends with him and kept my crush a secret but thanks to the dumb decisions I took, I fucked it up. Now I had to confront this and let go of my feelings for good.

"I... umm... don't really know what to say, but I only think of you as a friend. To me, everyone are friends. So I suggest you don't think much about this. I'll also forget about it today itself. In fact, I won't even think about it. And I guess you also shouldn't."

"Yep. Don't worry, it's just a silly crush.  I'll move on real quick"

Promises, promises.

Shut up, we're actually going to move on.

"Yeah, that's good to hear. We'll still be friends, I hope."

"Yea. Of course."

We both nodded and I gave him a polite smile as he got down the bus.

Phew. That went smoother than expected.

Now I should focus on moving on and not fucking up our friendship. It wasn't easy since I specialized in fucking things up. Atleast he took it in a sportive way. I smiled at how thoughtful he was.

Rohan Rajvansh. Can I really move on from you?

I didn't know. But I'd try my best.

==================================

We didn't chat that evening. We didn't speak in school the next day either. I was thankful for the space. As much as I loved talking to him and being with him, I needed to stay away from him for a few days to sort out my feelings. If we were going to be friends, I needed to stop feeling so blissful everytime I'm near him. It's wrong.

I sat a few rows away from him in bus, hoping he wouldn't feel bad. We talked everyday so it feels wrong to stop talking but I needed this time away. I couldn't be hung up over a guy in my high-school years. That just wasn't me. My career and family came before everything. It's actually surprising how I let Rohan so close to my heart, but I'd change that soon.

Aisha was the most disappointed one in all this mess. She and Rohan were classmates in her previous school so she seemed to know a lot about him. And she'd been questioning my taste ever since I told her Rohan was my crush. That wasn't so surprising since I questioned my own taste numerous times in the past months but as I got to know more about Rohan that idea had been fading away. He wasn't exactly handsome or hot but he wasn't so bad either. Moreover, I wasn't the kind of person to judge people based on their looks. Character always mattered more to me than looks since I was a 'date-to-marry' person.