Sweet Summer Sunsets- A Robert Irwin FanFic

Ashley

"I can hold you, ya know," I said. Robert should have known that I was more than happy to hold him or be there for him whenever he needed. He should know that when he was with me, he didn't have to hide any of his feelings just because he is a man.

"Please," He whispered. I hummed in response and he lay with his head on my chest, and his leg on top of mine. 

The feeling of him having his face by my breast made me tingle in between my legs, especially with what happened earlier. 

Once he got comfortable, my hands immediately went to his hair, and I slowly started working my fingers through it, dancing on his scalp. My other one lay over his back. 

I hummed lightly, a Johnny Cash song that I knew he enjoyed because it reminded him of his dad. I liked the way Robert and I knew everything there was to know about each other, and how we both remembered the little things about each other. It was refreshing to get the same effort that I put into someone. 

I felt Robert's body relax and knew he had finally fallen asleep again. 

I stayed awake, staring at the ceiling. My thoughts spiralled. About everything.Jackson, his cousin, Robert, my desire for him, Cait being my cousin. I know Robert had just calmed down from a panic attack from nightmares, but I was about to give myself one just from having thoughts. 

I then thought about something I read in a John Green book, Turtles All The Way Down, and how the main character, Aza, has OCD and thought spirals and a big thing she thinks about is how if she can't control her thoughts then she's not really herself, like her own independent being. 

I thought about how I refused to believe that my thoughts could control me or take over my life, and I decided that I was my own independent being and that I was going to spiral up, instead of down. 

I gently rubbed Robert's back, helping me ground myself with the feeling of the muscles under his back and admire the shape of his arm as it lay over me. 

I awoke to the sound of my phone vibrating, and I reached towards Robert's desk, fumbling with my phone before I pressed the button to silence it, not even bothering to look at the caller ID. I didn't even check the time but knew it was too early to be dealing with anyone else, especially after the late night Robert and I had. If it was anyone important they would call again, but I reasoned that it shouldn't be anyone important. 

Robert stirred, still lying on my chest. I rubbed his back, and he moved so his head was facing up towards me, his blue eyes half open. 

"Your phone?" he asked, yawning slightly. His voice was heavy with sleep, and I loved the husky sound of it in the morning like this. 

"Yeah, but it's okay. Not important," I said quietly, moving the hair out of his face. He gave me a soft smile. The Australian morning sun filtered in through the kinds, causing stripes of the sun to fall on Robert's face, making his blue eyes sparkle. 

He adjusted his head normally and after a few minutes of silence, I assumed he had fallen back to sleep. I eventually did too. 

Just to wake up what felt like maybe an hour later to my phone vibrating again, and with a groan I muted it once more. Robert stirred again, this time sitting up in bed. 

"Hey, it was your mum that called," he said. He probably noticed the last few seconds of the call and my mum's caller ID on the screen. 

"Oh, shit, hand me my phone please," I asked, sitting up and moving so I was facing Robert, my legs out in front of me.