Finn (bxb)

25. Acceptance

I reached the park and sat down on one of the swings. Soon enough, Theo showed up, dressed even warmer than I was. 

He sat on the swing next to mine. We simply sat there for a few moments in silence. Theo finally spoke up.

"Seb, talk."

Straight to the point. Damn.

I sighed. "Well, it's about Finn."

He nodded. "I figured. So, what happened?"

I told him about the gifts on the roof and Theo let out a low whistle.

"Damn, that's...something."

I groaned and held my head in my hands. "It's all just...so much. I don't know. I don't know anything."

I looked up at him in desperation. "Please, Theo."

I wasn't even sure what I was asking him, but he seemed to understand me.

He stood up and dusted off his clothes, before tugging on my arm and pulling me behind him. He dragged me all the way to the grass lawn and pushed me down.

He laid down next to me and stretched his arms out, like he was trying to make snow angels...on the grass.

"Seb, what is Finn to you?"

"A friend." I replied instantly.

"A friend, just like me?"

I nodded.

He propped himself up on his elbow and supported his head with his hand, so he could look at me more clearly.

"Seb, say I like this girl. She's cute, she's sweet, and she's just perfect to me. I have a giant crush on her. And I find out she likes me too. What would you tell me?"

I grinned at him. "I doubt anyone would put up with you, but I'd be so happy for you. Someone managing to deal with this-"

I poked at his arm. "This log, is a miracle."

He hummed. "Mmhm. Now imagine Finn has a girl on his mind, he's so into her, he's always thinking about her. And she likes him too."

I frowned. It grew deeper with every word Theo said.

"They start dating, and begin to go on dates. She is the one riding on his motorcycle, wearing his helmet and stealing his jackets. Cute, isn't it?"

It felt like I was being stabbed with little needles. Theo's unwavering gaze was fixed on mine.

"Wouldn't you be happy for him, Seb?"

I stared at the ground, fidgeting with a blade of grass. Theo's words sounded quite nightmarish to me.

"Seb?"

I managed to mumble out my answer. "No. I wouldn't be happy."

"Why, he's your friend just like me, isn't he?" He prodded.

I shook my head. Theo was relentless.

"But he's always thinking of being with her-" 

I interrupted his terrible imagination.

"But I want to be the one he's always thinking of!"

My eyes widened as I realized what I'd just said. Theo smiled and patted my head.

"There you have it, Seb." He said softly. "You have your answer."

I looked up at the sky before shutting my eyes tight.

I liked Finn.

I liked him so, so much.

I wanted to be the one always wearing his helmets and jackets and being on his mind. Not some random girl. I think that would kill me.

I grinned and got up, tackling Theo into a hug. "Thank you so much, Theo."

He patted my back. "Come on now, get home. It's quite late."

I said a quick bye before starting the walk to get back home. I started skipping instead of walking, my heart felt so much lighter once I'd accepted my feelings.

I sighed softly to myself. Deep down, I'd always known how strongly I liked him, but my brain just refused to accept it. Theo and Jenny must be having a real good laugh at me right now.

I reached home and walked into my room, Finn's gift catching my eye. I'd left it on the bed before leaving.

"Sebastian, you're back."

I jumped in surprise and noticed Finn looking at me expectantly from his room, both our windows wide open.

The moment I saw him, I knew I was doomed. It seemed as though finally coming clean to myself only amplified my feelings for him ten times more.

My throat went dry and I suddenly felt extremely shy. I opened and closed my mouth with no words coming out, and finally settled for a quick nod.

I pointed towards my door. "Right, um, I need to- wash the dishes. Bye!"

Before he could reply, I dashed out of my room. I managed to kill about an hour downstairs before slowly stepping back in. I sighed in relief when I saw his lights off.

I showered and changed, and decided to go to bed. Tomorrow was Monday after all.

I moved the box to my desk, and looked at all the drawings again. No wonder I fell for him, who wouldn't fall for a boy this amazing?

I grabbed the plushie and hugged it tightly, spinning around in joy. I finally shut the lights and laid in bed, Mr. Cactus tucked under my arm.

As I was about to drift asleep, my eyes suddenly snapped open as I realized my current situation.

How exactly was I going to face him tomorrow?

I couldn't handle one conversation with him today, how was I supposed to handle a whole day?!

I groaned and twisted about in my bed. Do I ask him out?

But what if he says no? What if there really was a girl he liked?

I buried my head in my pillow in frustration. How was I supposed to know if he likes me? If he didn't, and I confessed, I'd pretty much kill our friendship.

Do I just pretend to be friends?

I looked at Mr. Cactus in desperation. "What do I do?"

He didn't reply. Useless.

"I'll try. To act like everything's normal." I mumbled to myself, before finally falling asleep.

Damn you, Finn.

P.S.
Next chapter's gonna be from Finn's pov ;)