The conclusion part two

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(And with that ladies and gentlemen, i bid you all a fair well... thank you for growing up with me. If any of you feel the way the character I constructed in the story felt... reach out, get some help. Getting help changed my life, and my only regret is that I didn't seek it sooner, don't let your sadness become an obsession. I hope you enjoyed this nearly 10 year story run, I definitely enjoyed writing it. I wish you all well, thank you for encouraging me, and helping me express some dark emotions. Forever and always -pastel)

"Hey, are you going to Yvette's party tonight?" Sam whispered asked, as their teacher took role.

Ah shit.... the party... the end of the year "i don't give a fuck party".... she had forgotten all about it. She didn't know if she should go... but she felt the pull to go... she didn't know why.

"Uh... maybe?" She replied, not really sure. She wanted to go... of course she did, but with her bad luck, it was fifty fifty.

"Come on please!" Sam whispered yelled at her. "You're going go be my wingman! Jimmy's going go be there and i want a date to senior prom!"

Kaitlyn sighed... and dropped her head, focusing on her math worksheet. God... should she go...? What if something weird happened.... what if she acted weird....

"Come on..." sam whined, "i helped you get your date!"

"Fine...!" Kaitlyn groaned, "ill ask my mom"

She didn't really need to, her mom would have definitely said yes. Kaitlyn was a good girl, she had a well established trust with her family.

"Yes!" Sam squealed excitedly, and the teacher shushed her. Sam cut a mean pair of eyes to her... how dare she interrupt this incredibly important conversation?

"No talking..." the teacher, said sternly but was obviously disinterested.

Kaitlyn sighed again and texted her mom for permission.

"We can get ready at my house, have your mom drop you off around four and i can drive us"

"Well" Kaitlyn pondered... "at least at a party there will be alcohol and weed"

She could use a good drink.... after the course of the last few weeks... she needed one... and her stash was running pretty low.
She thought of Yvette, and how it would be nice to finally go to one of her famous parties.

Yvette was a girl who was friends with everyone, the entire school was invited, she liked Yvette, she was a nice girl, and her parents always allowed her to throw parties when they went on one of their many, many vacations.

She sorta wished like she was Yvette, Yvette was pretty... and popular... and just so normal. Man... how she strived for normalcy... it started to weigh on her... more and more... just how strange she was.. how fucked up she was.

First, it was the nightmares... she hasn't had a normal dream that she could remember probably since she was 10. The nightmare went one of two ways... either someone chasing her.. or she was chasing them. Then when someone caught or, when she caught someone... she would always wake up before the dream finished. It drove her crazy... she used to stay up for two, three days at a time until her body couldn't anymore and she would pass out, into the nightmare land. She had been taking sedatives and sleeping pills since she was 12, with no end in sight.

Second, the pills. She had been on a cocktail of antipsychotics, antidepressants and anti anxiety medications since she was on 14. They couldn't really nail down an illness since she was too young, but all the typical contenders were out there... possible BPD... manic depressive... OCD... psychotic depression... a mixture of one or two or all of the above she didn't know, and neither did any of the professionals, they just knew the pills worked.

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