Love & death: Feel it all

What's your secret

Tom pov:

Listening to Bill and Scarlett have sex in the other room fills me with rage. I want to be the one fucking her. I can hear her moans and I wish I made her sound like that. The rage almost brings out the evil in me, and as I look down at mine and Scar's little girl, I almost want to cut off her air supply sith a pillow. But what good would that do? It would just make me incredibly depressed and Scarlett would never do anything I say. I just need to find a way to get out my anger.
Fucking models.

I grab my phone and write a long text of a party invitation and with our adress. We are going to have a real Kaulitz Party tomorrow night, and I'm inviting every hot model, men and women all over Germany. If I can't fuck Scarlett, I'll just find someone else to fuck.

Scarlett pov:

Bill is all tangles in with me and I can't get out. The light is shining through the curtains so I know it's morning, but I don't really want to get out if bed. But I hear Cat crying in the room opposite us and I need to take care of her.

"Bill... Bill..." I quietly say and shake his arm until he groans.

"What? Oh... the baby." He says, now able to hear the cries too. We both slowly get out of bed and stomp our way to the other room, still half asleep.
My gown drags along the floor, gathering dust along the way. Bill is barely wearing any clothes, just his underwear. Which is fine since it's our baby and she's used to it. But when we step into the baby room, we see Tom standing with Cat in his arms. He doesn't look at us at first, he is too focussed on Cat. I realize that she wasn't crying. She was laughing.
Cat has a tight grip on two of Tom's braids, playing with them as if he's a living doll.

"Oh hello. Good morning." Tom says with a smile. They look so peaceful together, Tom and Cat. I can't really explain it. It looks so right. Like finding the last puzzlepiece that you've been looking for for hours. Cat was always meant to be Tom's daughter. Not Bill's. And that hurts my heart. I almost wish that we didn't use a condom last night to I could give him the child he wants. His own child. Not Tom's.

"Give me my baby." I say angrily as I stomp my way over to Tom. He looks dissapointed but he gives me the baby anyway. She doesn't want to let go of his braids and I don't want to just pull her away.

"What kind of magic does your body do?" Tom asks me. I look at him with confusion. What the hell does he mean by that?

"I mean... you seduce like every man. And you produce such a beautiful girl. What's your secret?" Tom asks. I don't really understand the question. He must be trying to make Bill angry.

"I guess... genetics. My mom was beautiful." I say, and Cat finally lets go of Tom's braids but takes a hold of my hair instead. That's never good. She always gets my hair tangled beyond recognision. But at least now I can get away from Tom. And Cat doesn't seem to miss Tom. She still looks happy in my arms which is a relief. I was getting scared that she would only stop crying when Tom holds her.

I realize that I need to basically interrogate Tom in a less interrogation way to find out if he has actually changed. And I can't do that with the baby and Bill in the room. I hand Bill the baby and tell him to leave the room.

"Why?" Bill asks with a mix of worry and anger. I think he's scared that I'll give in to Tom's charm, but I don't give in so easily.

"Please... just trust me." I say, not completely trustinc myself, but I have to try. Bill nods after looking at Tom skeptically and walking out of the room with Cat in his arms, still gigglinc and playing with anything she can find, which is now Bill's dreads.
I close the door after him and turn to Tom, taking a few steps closer to him.

"Why are we here?" I start by asking. It seems like the right place to start.
Tom shrugs.

"Because... I wanted to meet my girls." Tom says. The audacity.

"Your girlS." I say, putting emphasis on the S he put in the end of the word. Tom takes a carefull step closer to me, and then another.

"You heard me mention Cassie... she's not a woman yet. She's not feisty. She doesn't have that spark you have. She looks like you... except her body is less... woman. And I wanted you since the moment I saw you. And now Catherine... you know I have to protect her with my life if I have to. Even if Bill does too." Tom says. The things he said about me being the one he wants, gives me a rush I haven't felt in a long time.

"You were so fiesty back then. Remember when you almost shot me..." Tom starts laughing hysterically. I know that isn't a good memory of his which just makes it all the more terrifying.

"I was so turned on. But so angry. And you made me feel that way. Taylor never did. I took her virginity as well as Cassie's... well... she was raped by her first boyfriend... but you were raped too. When does rape count and when doesn't it? The rules keep changing..." Tom says still with a big joker-ish smile on his face.

"I have chosen Bill, you can forget about ever getting that close to me ever again. And you can forget about being a dad for Cat." I say, taking a careful step back. It's making me uncomfortable being so close to Tom, I don't know what I might do. I'm more scared of myself than him.
But now that I've made him angry, his steps just follow in my tracks until I feel my back hitting a wall. It scares me and I gasp involuntarily. Now there's nowhere to go. Tom presses his body against mine with his hands cupping my face. I writhe and twist to get out of his grip, but he's too strong.

"Don't fight it... I know you want me. I've read your jurnal." Tom says, making me stop writhing. He did what?

"That was private..." I say with the fury that I still have inside me from back in Tokyo.

"Not to me. The dreams I have of Tom are getting dirtier every day, I can't help but think about how my life would have been if I chose him and not Bill. You wrote that, Scar. I know that you want me. You love the excitement of cheating. Especially with someone as dangerous as me, right?" Tom says with a smirk, his face getting closer to mine. I'm paralyzed. Glued to the wall and to his body. Whatever he might do now, I can't stop it. My body won't let me.

Before I know it, the familiar cold feeling of his lip piercing touches my lip. It feels like an electrical shock running through my body. Like shooting up heroin for the first time. It's completely addicting, and not allowed.

***