Saving Jasper | ✓ [COMPLETE]

Chapter 35 - She Saved Him

It had been five weeks since Kayleigh’s funeral, and none of us had managed to recover from the emotional storm we’d been trudging through. It didn’t help any that school had once again started up, my senior year. I would be graduating this year, so I had to pick myself up and get everything back in place. Jasper would be starting his first official year of schooling, and aside from my depression, I was interested to see how he would do with that. On Tuesdays after school, and Saturdays on weekends, he went back and saw his therapist. The visits had lessened after each week, and he now only went twice a week, for three hours.

   

    I was, sadly, beginning to think that I would need therapy for myself. I kept seeing Kayleigh’s face in my mind. As she had struggled to hold on, her eyes had been surprisingly bright with fear. Even though she had went into remission, the doctors later on told us there was nothing we could have done. She had been in relapse for a few hours, when the cancer overruled her body. It wasn’t fair, that she had died so quickly. In the weeks she was in remission, she had looked so vibrant and healthy. As hard as I tried, I couldn’t process the fact that her life had been taken from her so quickly.

    Even now, as I sat in the window seat in my living room, I had to remind myself she wasn’t out there somewhere. She was gone. A cold, salty tear slid down my face as I watched the rain smash down from the sky, accompanied with thunder and lightning. It was ironic, how perfectly the scenery outside matched up with my mood. Father Neeson’s words came back to me as I watched the storm outside. Reaching up, I pressed my hand against the side of my face, drying the tear up. He had told me not to mourn for too long, that Kayleigh wouldn’t want me to. At the time, I rendered him ridiculous.

    Now, I found myself rethinking his words. Looking up at the dark, cloudy sky, I searched for a break in the clouds. Just when I thought I’d never find one, a tiny sliver shot through two large clouds, giving me a glimpse of the sky behind them. I imagined Kayleigh somewhere in the afterlife, watching down on me. I could picture the playful, chastising look on her face. Charlie, she would tell me, you need to smile. Smiles are pleasant, and you are a pleasant person. A tiny smile tugged at the corners of my lips as I shook my head and looked down at my hands, which were folded neatly in my lap.

    Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to stand. Another crash of thunder sounded overhead, momentarily drowning out the rhythmic sound of rain on the roof. I stepped away from the window and hugged my arms to my torso, suddenly wishing summer hadn’t fled so quickly. It was only September second, and I could already feel the beginnings of autumn. I walked silently through my house, drinking in the silence. My parents, less depressed themselves, were at work. They had left me on my own recently, knowing that time would heal my invisible wounds.

    Jasper was a different story. I was afraid this was hitting him even harder. A smile hadn’t touched his face since the morning after my birthday, six weeks ago. He spoke to me, his therapist, and my parents, but the conversations were always short.

    I took another deep breath as I climbed the stairs. I didn’t give his door a second glance as I turned to face my own. Surprise pulled me from my fog, and I looked blankly at the rose taped to my closed door. Yet another rose, taped to a piece of paper, had randomly crossed my path. I picked it up and automatically unfolded the small, square note.

    Smile, beautiful.

    I couldn’t help but smile. It was the thoughtfulness of the rose, along with the note, that brought the smile to my face. The smile didn’t last long, but it was there. Jasper was always finding ways to make me feel better, or let me know how he felt about me. For a minute, my mind to a trip back to the night he had told me he loved me. I had spent nearly five months with Jasper, and the fact that he had somehow learned to love me, the way I loved him, made me believe that this was all a dream.