Involuntary Victim - Book 3 in Jessie's Story

Chapter 16: Everything is Lost

I sat frozen, I couldn't be. There was no way, everything stopped working, I couldn't hear or see, I couldn't breath. How could this happen? We had been carful, we had gone straight to Nana to make sure, except that one time....

"Fuck." my voice finally came back. "The beach." 

Everything came slamming back, all my senses hit me all at once. The lights were too bright. The humming of the air conditioning was too loud, my breathing was loud, I could hear my own heartbeat. I sunk off the bed onto my knees on the floor. My breathing was irregular. Nana came and knelt down in front of me. She lifted my head. 

"Happy surprises." 

"Nana...."I whispered, my eyes going wide. "Those pills...I've been taking them for two months! Is that going to be dangerous?" I felt a sudden spike of fear, not for me, but for baby's health.

"No. No no no, my Little Missy. Pup will be okay. We will just stop taking them now." She brushed her thumbs across my cheeks. 

"Mama is keeping her cub?" 

"What? Yes! What are you talking about? Of course I am!" I spat savagely, scrambling backwards on my hands, "I've had enough people taken from me, I'm not giving up this baby! And...Minho isn't here to make that decision either! Don't ever ask me that again!" 

"Okay, Little Missy. Breath. Breath breath. I need to ask. It is my job. Now we make sure Mama and cub have the best care." 

I shifted so I sat with my arms wrapped around my waist. I blinked hard, the tears burnt. How was I going to do this? I could hardly take care of myself, how would I take care of another human? I was so dependent on Minho for everything, was it fare to throw another helpless human at him? I had so many questions swirling around my head. 

"Jessie." 

I looked up sharply. Nana never used my name. She was kneeling in the same place. But her face was set and serious. 

"Listen to Nana Ann." She crawled over and held my face tightly in her hands, "You are strong. You are brave. You are soft. You are caring. You do hard things. You can do this too. You are not alone alone alone, you have help. You have your wolf pack. Young Hunter and his Wolf will be wonderful protectors of their cub." 

"I'm scared." 

"If you are not scared. You are not human. Strength comes from deep inside," She placed a hand over my chest, over my heart. "It comes from the moments moments- times we think we can't but do anyways." 

I sniffed and took a slow breath. She smiled, her eyes were gentle and soft. 

"Your mama and daddy would be proud of you." 

"Are...are you?" I whispered. I had no idea who my parents were, I couldn't remember them, Nana had been that mother figure, and I needed her love and approval. My hands had found her wrists and I held them tight, trying to keep myself from acting on my fight or flight. 

"Yes." She said firmly, with no hesitation. "Yes yes yes. Nana is very proud of the Huntress my Little She wolf has become." 

I felt a little calmer. She pulled my head and kissed my forehead. I took a slow breath and held it for a second and then let it out. Nana got up with a small groan and then pulled me to my feet, and guided me back to the bed. She sat down beside me and handed me the paper with the results. It took me a second to focus on the typed words from the print out. 

"I'm ten weeks? It's been ten weeks?" I gasped and looked up to Nana who just nodded. I looked back down at the paper. Most of it didn't make sense to me, it was medical jargon and I couldn't understand.