More Junker Queen Oneshots ~REQUESTS CLOSED~

Ashamed

I didn't have scars like Odessa. Ones where she can flaunt around and tell others of the stories of how she got them. They were always the most interesting ones that hurt the most for her. The physical ones at least. The mental ones, only I know of those scars. And yet, even though we've been dating for quite sometime, she has yet to see the scar that I am most ashamed of.

She's seen the ones I sustained when I was younger, being careless and carefree when I was in the Wastelands. The ones that have the most stupid stories behind them. Either I ran bonked my head on a door frame, accidentally threw some nails at a metal panel and it ricocheted off and hit me in the arm. It were those stories where I hated what I did, but Odessa loved because it showed her a different side of me. But the one I never dare show her, is the one that was not caused by me.

Out in the Wastelands, it is known to get extremely hot. Scorching temperatures are the main cause of death out there either from the sun burns not being treated, heat stroke/heat poisoning, and dehydration. One thing that it does cause is fires due the air being so arid. A bush fire can easily cause houses to burn or melt, since it was made of metal. My house was unfortunate to be caught in one of those. My mother and father tried to get me out of the house, but I was trapped inside.

It was either I melt under the blazing metal that was coming down on me or burn trying to get out. I chose the latter before the former and I still would even to this day. However, I was hit with both. A large glob of melting metal landed on my face and it caused me to stumble into one of the flames, completely burning my back. I was out enough to where my mother grabbed my arm and pulled me to safety, but the damage has already been done. Two large scars can now be seen. However, I hide the one that is around my left eye. Either by putting makeup over it or my hair. Odessa knows about the one on my back, but not the one around my eye.

I stared at the red mark that surrounded my left eye. I was grateful I retained my sight, but there would be at times where my vision would go in and out for a short amount of time. I get it checked out every so often to see if there is anything wrong with it. However, due to some nerve damage, I wasn't able to cry out of that eye. The doctors said there might be a chance for me to get the nerves fixed, but that would require leaving Junkertown to do so. I don't want to look into it now. Besides, I lived with it for this long.

"Y/N? Ya in 'ere, darlin'?" the front door opened up.

I brushed my hair down my face to cover up the mark. I opened the bathroom door and found Odessa standing in our bedroom. A smile appeared on her face as she stepped towards me, placing her hands on my hips.

"There ya are, love," she said and kissed my forehead. "Ya ready?"

"For what?"

"Date night."

"Oh shit, I forgot it was tonight. What did ya have planned?"

"Goin' to take ya to the best place I know 'ere."

"Home?" I asked.

"No, silly," she chuckled. "We're goin' out to eat, love."

Shit. While I have been out and about, it still brought me fear that someone would see.

"Can we stay in, Dez? I really don't want to go out tonight."

"Of course, darlin'. Just as long as I get to spend time with ya. Do ya want me to go out and bring somethin' back?"

"Please."

"Want your usual?"

"You know it."

"Alright. I'll be back soon," she said and left the house.

This would give me time to not only give myself from more time, but to get the house ready for when we ate together. Which didn't take long at it. I was sitting on the couch, trying to get the TV to work when she came back with food in her hand. She set down the boxes on the coffee table and we sat on the ground, eating together.

"Aye, love, ya got somethin'," she pointed to the left side of her face.

"Did I get it?" I asked after I rubbed nothing off.

"No, 'ere," she said and took a napkin, wiping my face. "There."

But when she pulled the napkin away, it brushed some of my hair away from my face, some of the mark being revealed.

"Y/N, I know I don't ask ya why ya hide the left side of your face, but can I ask just this once?"

I let out a sigh, "Do you promise ya won't see me differently?"

"I love you with my whole heart, Y/N. Of course I won't see ya any differently."

I nodded my head and reached up, pulling back my hair and revealing the burn scar. I slowly turned my head and faced her. She wiped her hands quickly and placed them on my cheeks. She lightly brushed her thumb over the scar.

"Does it hurt?"

"I can't really feel anything."

"Can ya see?"

"I can. Sometimes my vision goes in and out at times in that eye."

"How did ya get it?"

"Bush fire caused my house to burn."

She nodded her head. I reached up and pushed her hands away.

"I-I'm sorry, Dez."

"For what?"

"For bein' this way. For not tellin' ya. I-I didn't know what you would think of me if ya found out I had a scar."

"So?"

"So?! You're covered with scars, but they're not from anythin' stupid like mine."

"Ya think a bush fire causin' a house to burn down is stupid?"

"To me, yeah. You got most of your scars from battles and fights you were in. That's not as stupid as tryin' to flee from a burnin' house."

"Y/N, if anythin', how I received my scars are stupid. I either don't block or dodge on time or I end up dodgin' things with my arm or leg. I can take hits over and over, but the scars remind me of my recklessness in those fights. Sure, I can't actively avoid gettin' slashed or cut, but I can actively avoid gettin' killed. And if I have to take cuts and slashes, then I will. How you got your scar, you should never be ashamed of wantin' to save yourself in any situation."

She reached over and grabbed my hand, making me look up at her.

"Is that understood?"

Some tears formed in my right eye and slid down my face as I slowly nodded.

"Yes, Dez."

"Good," she said and leaned over, placing a kiss to my cheek.