The Impossible is Possible (Ryden)

Chapter 7

The mall is busy and bright, and Brendon doesn't much like it.

He sat upon the barrier surrounding the fountain, watching the hoards of people bustle past. Beside him sits Spencer, and they're waiting for Jon to arrive. It's three in the afternoon, and Brendon knows that when Jon comes he's going to make his excuses and leave for Ryan's. After all, Spencer and Jon will hardly miss him, he's sure.

It seems that Spencer hadn't realised that Brendon and Ryan had been eavesdropping the previous day; he's not mentioned it, at any rate, and it's not awkward between them. Brendon hasn't given much thought to what he'd overheard; he's been thinking of Ryan and their project a lot, but now he dwells upon it, he wonders how Spencer can be so sure.

From puberty, Brendon's always been mystified by sexuality. He's tried his hardest to get on with girls, but not only do they all seem to think him a loser, he just can't make himself like them, sexually. Sometimes he tries to tell himself that he just hasn't met the right girl yet, but he's not sure he believes that.

He's not exactly unexposed to the world of relationships, though. Just to relationships with girls. He'd had a boyfriend in 11th grade at his old school - a beautiful, shy boy called Lawrence - but it had had to stop when the entire school found out and the both of them had been beaten to a pulp, almost daily. The memory still stings, especially that of Lawrence telling him that they had to end it, and it had been more of an experiment than anything else, and that he just couldn't handle the amount of energy Brendon had all the time.

"Brendon," Spencer sighs, poking him in the shoulder to get his attention. Brendon starts, blinking away his memories, and glances at his friend questioningly. Spencer smiles, obviously relieved he's back in the present. "We haven't properly spoken since the first day, have we? I keep meaning to ask - how are things with Ryan Ross shaping up?"

"Better than I thought they would," Brendon shrugs, wondering how to sum up what's happened between them so far. "I mean, I still can't really call us friends, I guess, but we've been getting on better. You know when he dragged me out of Music yesterday? He took me back to his place and helped clean the cut and everything. He was really nice about it. But I still don't understand him."

Spencer shakes his head, looking awed. "I can't believe that Ryan Ross invited you to his house and actually helped you."

"Is it really that hard to believe?" Brendon asks, tilting his head to one side. "I mean, I know that he's a little...well, I don't know. He keeps himself to himself and everything, and he can have some serious mood swings. But he's not that bad."

"You haven't seen him when he goes over the edge," Spencer says, with a slight frown. "He carries a knife, Brendon. I told you, you really shouldn't mix with him too much. He's dangerous."

Brendon looks away, not agreeing but not wanting to voice it, either. He looks up, with a smile, a question suddenly striking him. "How are things with you and Jon, hmm?"

Spencer colours, dramatically, and he clears his throat. "Um. In what sense?"

Brendon fixes him with a stern, knowing look. "Come on, you're both beyond obvious. You know perfectly well in what sense."

"I don't," Spencer replies, weakly. He bites his lip, and then heaves a heavy sigh. "Fine. You're right, okay? I think I kind of like him. A lot."

Brendon smiles so widely that his lip begins to sting again. "I knew it. He totally likes you back, you know. You should see the way he talks about you and everything. Oh, wait, I know! When he gets here I'm going to Ryan's to work on our project, so you have to tell him how you feel. He'll say it back and everything, I know. But yeah, you absolutely have to, because --"