On Finding Chance

Part 2 - Chapter 12

There is a knock on the door. Perhaps, it is my parents. I keep my eyes shut but burst them open upon hearing the unfamiliar voices. Two nurses are attending to my brother who remains fast asleep. I try to fix myself and look presentable. I smile at them and go straight to the washroom. It is funny how I can overhear bits of their giddy moments of conversation though they are almost whispering. No doubt the object of their affection is the charmer on the bed. But, I think they are also talking about someone else.

As soon as I step out of the washroom, the nurses stop with their chitchat. Really, they are too obvious. Good thing Gab is not yet here or they will not be able to break her great wall. I do not want to ruin their good mood so I walk over to them and ask about Harvey's condition.

Thank God his vital signs are stable and he is recovering fast. Regarding the test results, another physician will take over auntie Cali who needs to perform an emergency operation. Apparently, it is this other physician who they were talking about earlier and he should be here any minute now.

Another knock. Here he comes.

Oh c'mon! The mystery doctor is my brother's substitute physician??? Why does he have to see me during my bad hair day? Literally! I just woke up and have not taken a bath. This is much more embarrassing than the interview. Earth, swallow me now, please!!!!!

I try every attempt to look pretty or at least cute. And of course, I fail. He doesn't seem bothered, though. His energy feels different from last night. More strict? More reserved? Maybe that is how he truly is when doing his rounds.

He and the nurses finished talking and he turned to me.

"Hi!!!," I say cheerfully. Ok, way too cheerful. Damn it! Control yourself, girl!

He does not respond. COLD MUCH?

"Sorry. How's my brother's results, Doctor?" I say, emphasizing on the last two syllables. I can't help it. Maybe he is being professional but the ice attitude stings.

He is explaining to me the results - no serious illness or complications. All he needs is a week's rest and he will be fine. A nurse interrupts him seeing that Harvey is already awake. He looks at me, to the doctor, to the nurses, back to me and then to the doctor again. Is this doctor 100% sure there is nothing wrong with my brother? Because my intuition suggests something is definitely not right here. The boys have not broken their eye contact. Fortunately, the other nurse asks if he wants to check his patient now.

"Why are you here?" asks Harvey in a rather annoyed tone.

"Hi Harvey. I'm substituting for Dr. Torres."

After the introduction, he tells Harvey the same things he explained to me. My brother only nods which is very rare. He usually has something funny to say like "nice coat, doc."

After his checkup, Harvey closes his eyes again. Why is he being so rude? Call me a bad sister but I cannot tolerate his attitude. When we are left alone, I immediately question (well, more of lecture) him about his behavior but seemingly the joke's on me.

Harvey called my parents and they immediately rushed to the hospital and explained everything to me. Mom starts to talk first.

"Madie, before anything, please know we only did what we did to protect you. We only want what is best for you. We are all very very sorry about this, baby. We really are."

Mom starts crying so dad continues instead.

"What do you want to know?", he asks.

"What's going on here?", I reply.

"You know the substitute doctor?"

A pause that feels like an eternity.

"What about him?"

Dad continues, "He's Dylan Taylor...your boyfriend. Eh, ex-boyfriend."

"WHAT???"

Seriously? After five years? They are only telling me this important detail today?

If it isn't for Harvey's hand holding mine, I would have stormed out of the room already.

"How is that possible?", I manage to say.

"Madie, he disappeared after the accident. He did not visit you. He cut all our communication. He simply vanished. We had no idea what happened to him. When you lost a decade of your memory, we were broken, too. You were not the only one who needed to endure the pain. We were there all the way, baby girl. We cried when you cried. We struggled when you struggled. We also had a hard time, especially your mom. That tragic event did not only change your life. It changed ours as well. But if there is one thing I am thankful for, it is the fact that you forgot about him. You had a lot on your plate and we could not make you get through another hell by getting your heart broken by that boy."

"So you chose to hide the truth instead? You're my family. We promised to be honest with each other. I trust you with my life. "

It is my brother's turn to speak, "We're really sorry, baby girl. We truly are. But we will do it again a hundred times to protect you."

"I don't need protection! I need to be alone! Please...please...", I beg as Harvey lets go of his grip.

My mind is in total chaos. How can I believe them again? What if there is more they are not telling me? I walk to the chapel again. Maybe in there lies the answers.

There is only one person inside. I place myself in the front pew and start conversing with God.

Father God, why? Why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? Am I a bad person? You know how hard I suffered because of that accident. It was the darkest time of my life. And now this? Help me, Lord. Help me. Take away this burden and pain. Help me move on...to let go...to accept and to forgive. I know how much my family loves me. I acknowledge that they only did it to protect me. But it still sure hurts a lot. And about Dylan, why did he leave and left me hanging? What happened between us? How long were we together? How did we meet? Does he know about my condition? I have always dreamed of having a special someone to hold me and care for me, to share my stories and adventures with. I thought no one could ever accept me again because I lost my memories. I shut every boy who tried to win my heart because I am too scared that they will end up leaving once they know the truth about me. But Dylan...Dylan is different. We actually had a relationship. That's it. Talking to him is a must. I need to find out the answers immediately.