i stare blankly.
outside i can
hear blaring sirens,
shouts and screams,
the rush of traffic.
everything seems so
lively.
i raise the freshly lit
cigarette to my
chapped lips and
slowly draw on it.
it used to make me
choke.
the smell;
the taste.
now, it's comforting.
it's almost familiar.
it brings a sense
of normality to
things.
as i allow the smoke
to swirl around me,
i close my eyes.
how had it come to this?
i used to be happy;
so full of life.
i used to be okay.
but now it was part
of life.
i'd allow pj to do
whatever he wanted
to me.
i was his, after all.
there was no point
in fighting back.
i was just a dead man
walking.
there was no point to
my existence.
not since i lost dan.
nothing mattered since
then.
nothing.
-
a/n: oops shitty chapter bc I'm waiting on the bus
YOU ARE READING
control ;; phan
Fanfiction"goddamn right, you should be scared of me" {this fan fiction contains some very triggering topics}
