Not so Bad [UNDER CONSTRUCTION]

05 | honey

C H A P T E R 0 5

I was so shocked. I was so so gobsmacked. Speechless I was.

Completely ignoring me, they all trickled off into their vehicles probably 'giving me time'. They all walked off leaving me to think.

I thought they were so nice. They were so kind to me. For once I felt accepted. But...but they had horrible views. So what if a guy was gay? So what if he liked guys instead of girls. Even if he was a bit rude to me, no-one should get treated that way.

I felt so lost. Should I carry on being friends with people who actually accept me for me even if they are small minded? Was I being selfish?

This was the first time I ever felt like I belonged. Should I throw it away? Would I even be able to stand up for him?

Even thinking about confronting someone made me feel like I was having a heart attack. No-way could I ever fight for anything.

I was too weak.

But I knew I couldn't just stand there and watch as they pushed him out making him feel lonely. However, for once in my life I fit in. It was like I was supposed to be there with these people.

B-but these people were homophobic and that's one thing I can't take. A loud beep ripped me out of my thoughts.

"Are you coming or not?"Tyler shouted, his head peeking out of the car.

Car's beeped behind him as Tyler looked expectantly at me. Trudging towards my car, I entered.

"Auntie Jackie is home today." That brightened my day considerably. Just like me, she never fit in with the 'family', she was insanely clever but didn't think that it was that important. Now she helps at a charity in Africa setting up health centres.

She was my escape. She was my inspirations though I wasn't as clever or as inventive as her. She was the only one in the family who seemed even a little like me.

At last I wasn't that much of an out cast. Forgetting about school, I just concentrated on meeting my aunt because she rarely ever comes and she was weird.

Just thinking about her and her childish antics made me smile.

Tyler turned off the ignition and the house loomed above. Running towards the door, I opened it and stumbled into the house.

"What are you doing on the floor Tami?" My mum asked coldly.

"Now, now children. Be civil." Aunt Jackie chirped as she walked down the stairs elegantly while wearing the weirdest combination of clothes that she seemed to pull off.

She stood challenging my mum with a polka dot dress clahing with a green and red flannel. Weird but matched her. She was so strong, independent, funny and intelligent.

Mum huffed and turned towards Jackie, "I'm older."

"Agnes Hanes White, don't be so immature. Age is just a number." Jackie jackled at the end and mum looked murderous, no-one in their right mind would utter her first name without her wrath but Jackie did.

I always wondered about their relationship, it was like hate-love, sometimes I wondered what they were talking about with their silent language.

Jackie pulled me into a tight hug, 'I can't breathe.' I said.

She let go, "Oops!"

Catching my breath, Tyler came through the door to be attacked by Jackie winding him. Tyler wasn't one for contact and looked at me for help.

Now should I leave him or... I decided to leave him as Jackie stuck to him like a leech. I walked up stairs slowly, smiling evilly.

"Where do you think you're going young lady?"

I turned back slowly to see my moth standing looking upwards, asserting authority. She stood in her impossibly high heels wearing a lilac outfit. How did I turn out so shit, and she seemed so perfect?

"I don't feel very well." I faked a grimace.

"Your aunt has decided to visit us and even if you are sick you will still attend dinner." She said crossing her arms.

Aunt Jackie burst out laughing, "Just let her rest sis. She does look a bit pale."

My mum huffed realising she would never win and stomped away. 'Thank you' I mouthed.

"You're not off the hook." she warned, mouthing back.

Pulling Tyler along he looked back pleadingly but I just wanted to be alone.

Walking up the winding stairs and through many corridors, I reached my room flopping on my bed.

I remember going to Atherton and having absolutely no friends at all because I didn't have a high enough IQ. I remember feeling so lonely and so lost in the darkness.

It got so bad that I deliberately failed the exams that I looked like a lost hope and 'sadly' they kicked me out because my grades were not sufficient.

Tyler surfed through the exams and didn't even have to revise, he was just one of those people who could remember a lot quickly and keep it.

Now with a fresh start, I'm welcomed into the school where I felt like I belonged. But how could I just live with the fact that my new friends were bullying another person.

"Well? What is it?" Jackie said.

"Don't do that, you scared me." I held my heart as it beated two times as fast.

I looked up to the clock to see hours had passed and I hadn't moved an inch, "Nothing. Nothing at all. What would be the matter?"

I said it all so fast that even I knew I sounded suspicious. Jackie just raised her eyebrow and sat down on the bed.

"You tell me." She replied.

I breathed out, "Would you allow someone to be bullied?"

"Of course not! What do you mean?"

"I know you would say that. It's just the first time I ever feel accepted but someone else isn't."

"Do you want to explain to me or leave me in the dark?" She looked calm and not angry.

And so I explained to her. She stayed silent for a few minutes leaving me apprehensive. She said, "Remember when you went to Atherton and no-one accepted you and feel like utter shit. You deliberately failed the school because of how people treated you."

She held my arms, "Remember that feeling and realise he is going through that and probably more. You make the choice but just remember."

She kissed my forehead walked out of the room leaving me even more confused.

What am I going to do?

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Immy x