bulletproof - calm ot4

19- it's been like this now for days

Keeping me awake, it's been like this now for days. My heart is out at sea, my head all over the place. I'm losing sense of time and everything tastes the same. I'll be home in a day. I fear that's a month too late.

-

Michael's heart drops when he finds his missing underwear. He knew that Aaron must've taken it, but he had no idea what he was going to do with it. Until now.

They're stuffed into his locker. Michael has no idea how Aaron found out his combination, because the boxers certainly couldn't fit through the vents, and it makes him extremely nervous.

As soon as the locker door swings open, Michael's eyes land on them, and he panics. He grabs them, stuffing them into his backpack so quickly he barely notices the white stains. He feels like his head is spinning, terrified that someone saw them. Has Aaron told anyone? Would people make assumptions?

Michael braced himself against the locker, trying to catch his breath. How did Aaron gain so much leverage over him? Just a week ago Michael had the upper hand, and now the green eyed boy cowers at the sound of Aaron's name. He hates it. He hates feeling weak and vulnerable. He wishes he killed Aaron when he had the chance.

Taking a deep breath, Michael composes himself. His next class is with Luke, he'll be fine. Aaron can't do anything to him or any of his boys here at school, with witnesses at every turn. He'll be fine.

Michael reaches into his locker for the textbook he needs, but his fingers lock around something else instead. It's a crumbled up piece of paper--which isn't unusual, considering how messy Michael's locker is--but Michael doesn't think he's seen it before.

Ignoring the fact that the bell has already rung and he is going to be late to class, Michael curiously unfolds the paper ball. His breath catches in his throat, making him dizzy. He fu cking hates Aaron. But even more than that, he's fu cking afraid of him.

Michael crumbles the piece of paper back up, shoving it into his pocket before slamming his locker door and heading to class. He tries to focus on the lesson and he tries to focus on Luke's shaky fingers tracing stars on his palm, but all he can think about is the goddamn note.

Princess is next.

-

Ashton hates missing class, but he would do it for Luke in a heartbeat. The blonde texted him during the class directly after lunch, claiming that he couldn't breathe and he needed him. In a split second Ashton was headed toward the bathroom to comfort his baby.

As soon as Ashton approaches the bathroom, he hears sniffling.

"Luke?" he calls, worry lacing his voice.

There's a whimper, a gasp, and Luke's hoarse voice pleading, "A-Ash." The door to the handicap stall swings open.

Ashton rushes in, greeted by the sight of his pale boyfriend curled into a ball next to the toilet and shaking.

"Hey, hey, I'm here," Ashton says, crouching down onto the ground next to Luke. "What's wrong, love?"

Luke throws himself into Ashton's arms, fisting the older boy's t-shirt. "F-Food."

"Food?" Ashton asks, frowning as he strokes Luke's back calmingly. "Are you hungry? You ate lunch but we can go get more if you want--"

Luke shakes his head viscously, burying his face in Ashton's shoulder. "N-No!" he exclaims. "No more."

Ashton tightens his arms around Luke as he realizes what Luke means. The frail boy's body isn't used to large quantities of food and either his body is rejecting it, or he wants to eject it. "That's okay, you don't have to eat anymore today."

"Wanna get r-rid of it," Luke stammers.

"I'm so proud of you, love," Ashton coos, ignoring Luke's heartbreaking comment. "So, so proud of you for eating."

Luke shakes his head, choking on a sob. "H-Hate eating."

Ashton winces, but continues stroking Luke's hair, allowing the smaller boy to curl up into his chest. "Shhh, shhh. It's okay." Both of them know that it isn't okay, but both of them are too afraid to acknowledge it. Ashton knows he should've listened to the doctors who released Luke from the hospital when they advised getting him a therapist, but he didn't.

"Hey, Lukey?" Ashton asks, an idea springing into his head. Luke lifts his head off of the muscular boy's shoulder, gazing up at Ashton curiously, blinking away tears. "C'mon, love, let's stand up."

Ashton pulls the two of them to their feet, slipping his hand into Luke's.

"A-Ash--?"

"Shh," Ashton coos, wiping the tears off the frail boy's face with his thumb and pressing a kiss to his forehead. "Come with me."

-

The look of panic on Luke's face when he sees where Ashton is taking him is the most painful thing that Ashton has ever seen, but he knows that he has to do what's best for his boyfriend.

"A-Ash, please, please don't m-make me--" the blonde whimpers, wrapping his body around Ashton's arm, trying to slow his boyfriend down.

"I'm gonna be here with you the whole time, love," Ashton promises. "We just..." Ashton sighs. "We have to get you some help." Without waiting to hear Luke's response, Ashton knocks sharply on the school counselor's door.

A confused looking Ms. Greene swings the door open, but the confusion turns to surprise when her eyes land on Luke. "Lucas?" Her gaze shifts to Ashton. "Ashton?" Her eyes flickers down to their intertwined hands, but she says nothing. "What can I do for you boys?"

"Hi, Ms. Greene," Ashton smiles, squeezing Luke's hand softly. "Can we come in?"

The counselor nods, stepping aside for the two to enter. Ashton tugs Luke across the threshold, sitting the nervous boy down on the couch before settling next to him. Ms. Greene takes her seat at her desk, elbows propped up on the wooden surface with a mixture of acceptable-interest and overeagerness gracing her face.

"So, what brings you here, boys?" Ms. Greene asks, eyes locked on Luke. The blonde squirms nervously under the woman's gaze, curling himself into Ashton's side.

"We need to talk," Ashton admits, running his thumb across Luke's knuckles. "About Luke."

-

Michael left school after finding his underwear in his locker. He couldn't shake the panic that had settled in his bones, the feeling that Aaron was going to be around every corner, ready to hurt him again.

Michael ditched, speeding through the rain and to his building, trudging through the lobby and up the stairs until he was standing in the doorway of his apartment, dripping wet and shivering. He kicks off his shoes, but doesn't even bother to take off his wet clothes before collapsing in bed.

Michael bites his lip, refusing to let sobs wrack his body like they want to. Tears slip down his cheeks, but they could easily be mistaken for rainwater. He closes his eyes, hugging his pillow and pretending that it's one of his boys. His princess. His nerd. His baby.

~

A/N: hi friends!!! sorry this chapter is so insanely overdue omg

but how is everyone doing??? if you're american, how was your thanksgiving? mine was pretty good, i barely left my house lmao but i havent done any of my homework yet oops

how do we feel about the chapter? michael finding his underwear? luke's anorexia/bulimia? ashton making him go to the counselor about it?

also so typically im not a huge fan of hetero fics but ive found myself really really into dramione lately??? so if anyone who is also a huge nerd like i am knows any good dramione fics that would be hella cool

i love you my angels (':