Chapter 35

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Carrying her past her room and directly into his, Kell didn't let her go until she was safely resting on his bed. Even then, he left her side only long enough to close the door and take off his shirt. He paused simply to gaze at her shaky little form. She looked so small and helpless sitting there, bathed in the blue glow of the moon.

Something about this moment screamed for a little skin on skin contact. As if reading his mind, Becky tugged off her own top and silently held her arms out for him.

Needing even more than that, Kelley crawled into her embrace, swiftly undid the clasp of her lacy bra and tossed it away. He held her softness to his smooth, hard chest and took a deep breath. She tensed for only a few seconds before relaxing into his enveloping warmth. "Let me hold you, love. Just like this," he murmured, running his fingers soothingly over her back.

"Okay... but I don't want to give you the wrong idea," she confessed, still upset by the whole ordeal.

"Oh, love... stop," he crooned, hugging her close. "I should never have said those things to you. You didn't deserve it. It was wrong of me. Please, forgive me."

"You broke my heart, is what you did!" Unwittingly, Becky burrowed her face into his smooth chest.

"Ugh... and in the process I broke my own. Forgive me, love." Smoothing his hand over her hair, he planted a kiss on her head.

"Am I so terrible a creature?"

"What?"

"My mere presence in this house causes such strife, such animosity between friends." She gazed up, blinking her bleary eyes at him.

"Becky, no... I was being stupid, jealous..." He pressed their foreheads together and wiped her tears with his thumb.

"It's true, even Gracie thinks it. She told me so herself."

"Gracie? What the fuck does she know?" He gave her hair a gentle tug backwards to better look at her.

"Apparently a lot more than I do. I've been nothing but trouble. You should never have allowed me to move in here. Jax had the right idea. I'm not worth it. You were all better off without me." Fighting her way back into his embrace, she sought the familiar solace of his warmth.

"Oh, Becky, have I fucked you up so badly?" He choked back a sudden sob of regret while cradling her head against his chest. "All I ever do is hurt the ones I love."

"Am I nothing more than a possible conquest for you? All of you? Have I no other value?" Too distraught to process any of his words, Becky continued to blurt out her own fears.

"Sweet thing, stop..." he pleaded, feeling helpless in the wake of her self-destructive thoughts.

"I'm afraid I don't know where I stand with you, Crispin or Dorian anymore. Do you even care about me as a person? Do my feelings matter?"

"Oh my God... I have royally messed you up, haven't I?"

"Am I really alone in this world? Have I no true friends here? Please, Kelley, help me understand. I feel completely lost. I don't know who I am anymore. My granny's gone and I have no one else to talk to."

Rendered speechless, Kelley couldn't fight the gut wrenching pain in his heart or the tears that stubbornly leaked from his eyes. The only thing he could do was hold her close and listen. What could he even think to say that would come close to doing any good at this point? The poor sweet girl was devastated and it was all his fault.

Exhausted both physically and emotionally, Becky let out a heavy sigh. As much as it hurt to put into words, all her skewed misgivings and concerns, the fact that she'd gotten it out of her system, did her a world of good.

"Sh... rest your mind, love," he eventually did say when she grew weary. "You're worth more than you know." Smoothing his hands up and down her back, he pulled her in impossibly closer. He even went so far as to rest a heavy leg over her lower half.

She nodded, drying her tears in his hair before drifting off to sleep.

Lying there holding her, Kelley realized that this situation required some serious attention. In mere months, he and his housemates had somehow taken a beautiful sweet girl and stripped her of every ounce of her self-confidence. They'd made her feel ashamed of her very own existence. When in reality, it was their own insecurities that had reared their ugly heads. His self-doubts and jealous tendencies had hurt her first and foremost since it was he who she looked up to. She trusted him and he had let her down.

Well, things were about to change. No longer would he place his concerns above hers. Hopefully, it wasn't too late to build her up again to her former spunky self. It wasn't going to be easy. In fact, it was going to be quite tricky and he'd be a fool to believe that he'd be capable of doing it all on his own.


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To be continued...

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House of Goths Copyright © 2014 by Maria Bernard ISBN: 978-0-9938067-3-5

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