[Jimin's POV]
Last night was a blur.
All I remember is drinking away my feelings for Hoseok and hooking up with Jungkook to try and forget about him and move on.
Hoseok doesn't love me, right? Because if he does he would've told me by now, knowing how he can't shut up for more than 2 seconds. He's so cute. Why can't he be mine?
That party we were at was boring as hell anyway and I was wasted and upset. What drove me to hook up with Jungkook that night I don't even know. I guess I was just sick of feeling alone, I didn't know what else to do and Jungkook was giving me flirty eyes the entire time so I figured it wouldn't hurt anyone.
I was wrong. It hurt me. And it's going to hurt Jungkook when I tell him how I really feel because my heart doesn't belong to him. It belongs to Hoseok.
Always.
It's morning now and I stayed the night at Jungkook's place because I didn't want Hoseok to see me like this. Nothing happened once we got to his place though I could see that he wanted something to happen. I just sat on the couch and before I knew it I fell asleep in that same spot.
At 10:07 am I woke up. I remember the exact time because 7 is Hoseok's favourite number. It's those little facts about him that I love most. All the little, insignificant things that I learned about him in all these years that we've been friends.
It was about 11 am when me and Jungkook got back to mine and Hoseok's shared apartment. I let Jungkook come inside for a bit to tell him what I wanted to tell him and he said he understood. I could see the slight pain in his face but I was shocked when he told me that he already knew that I was in love with Hoseok.
Shocked but also really relieved.
After that he stayed a little while longer and when he stepped outside the door he said: "I really enjoyed last night." To which all I could reply was a quiet: "yeah, me too... Thank you" before he gave me one last kiss that meant as much as "thank you for being honest, goodbye."
With that I returned to my room and after a while I decided that I should tell Hoseok what happened and how I felt about him. So I texted him. But he didn't respond even though I could see on my phone that he'd read my message. I didn't know where he was or what he was doing and I began to worry.
After over an hour he still hadn't texted me back or returned home and my worry turned into fear. Fear that anything had happened to him because last time I saw him was when he left the party drunk and almost crying. I had wanted to chase after him but at the moment I was intertwined with Jungkook and I couldn't find the courage to just leave him there in the middle of the dance floor.
Besides, it had never been a habit of his to just disappear and not return my text because even though we lived together we were constantly texting each other when we weren't together.
So him doing both at the same time was alarming to say the least. After an hour and a half I couldn't take it anymore and I called him. Again. And again. But no luck. He wasn't answering any of my calls or the 21 text messages that I sent him.
Out of sheer desperation I burst outside our apartment and went banging on Taehyung and Jin's door until Tae opened up and I stormed in totally shaking, almost yelling at them whether they had seen Hoseok.
The look on Tae's face was one that gave away that he knew more and that it made him scared shitless to know that Hoseok hadn't actually gone back to our apartment.
We had split up and I had been running around for over an hour trying to find Hoseok. I was desperate now, I was crying, afraid that something had happened to him. I was still running and I wasn't even out of breath. The adrenaline pumping through my body kept me going to find Hoseok. I was continuously shouting out his name and I didn't care that people were looking at me as if I was some lunatic. I had never felt so scared in my life.
After what felt like hours of running (it actually were hours of running) I got to a small cafe. The place where I first met Hoseok.
To my surprise he was sitting there at a table in the corner of the cafe with an untouched glass of water in front of him staring at the wall. I didn't know what to think and my body completely froze for some reason.
I walked into the cafe. Hoseok didn't notice me until I sat right in front of him on the other side of his table. Even then he didn't move it was like he was paralysed. I was still trying to catch my breath from all the running. I could see his eyes were burning red as if he had been crying all day.
"Hoseok?"
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I'll try to update as much as possible
Thank you to whoever is reading this
I love you ❤️
