I Can't

It was all a lie

Giving Don a moment to process what he just heard, Sara stood with her lips sealed, her eyes fixed on him. He then showed her to take a seat and she did, opposite him. And still he didn't know what to say, realizing that his daughter, he quickly counted in his head, his beautiful nineteen year old daughter was sitting in front of him, with whom he wanted nothing to do at first.

"Sara..."

"Yes." She nodded.

"My daughter." She gave a nod of her head again. "I... I never thought we would actually meet. I knew that... that Stevie kept... you, but, us meeting each other?" Don shook his head, exhaling heavily. "Why did you decide to find me?"

"About a week ago, I was reading one of my mother's journals and I came across an entry, which told me the truth, while she couldn't, she didn't bother doing it."

"Wait... you mean, you didn't know? Your whole life, you didn't know I was your biological father?"

"No. And if I hadn't asked for those diaries, I don't think I would have ever known about it. I confronted my mother about it and like always, being the drama queen she is, she started crying, Dad jumping in to defend her, both saying how they were doing me a favor. She told me all about how you didn't want me, told her to abort me... I guess, it's why I'm here. I want to hear your side of the story."

"I think I need something stronger than just coffee." Don for once was being nervous, unable to maintain eye contact with Sara for too long.

"Is it true? Did you really say to my Mom to terminate the pregnancy?"

"... Yes, I did." Closing his eyes, as he admitted with a sigh. "I mean... We were too young for parenthood, we were in this crazy rock and roll world, we hadn't even really been going out for too long and here she is, coming to me, saying, that we're going to have a baby."

"Weren't you around thirty years old at the time?"

"That's right, I was. But I didn't feel like I was ready to become a dad, Sara. I was too busy playing rock music, touring around the world, drinking expensive alcohol and switching one eye candy on my arm to another."

Raising an eyebrow... "So, you're saying you weren't faithful to my mother?"

"Like she was. She and Lindsey kept seeing each other behind my back the whole duration of our relationship. Whatever you think, she's not a saint."

"No, I know that, especially now, but I simply think it's inappropriate. If my fiance did that to me, the last thing he would still be is my fiance."

"You're engaged?"

"Yes, but that's not what I'm here for." Not getting into more detail, Sara asked. "Did you fantasize though? Even when you said you didn't want me, did you ever wonder how I would look like, what I would be like? If I took more after you or Mom?"

Then, all the things he did and said, were so easy, but now Don had to take a second, swallowing the lump that had started to form in his throat. "My honesty might hurt your feelings."

"Trust me, my own mother hurt me like nobody ever could, so don't hold back."

"No, I never thought about you. When Stevie and I split, I tried my best to forget about your existence. I felt like I had made my decision and I couldn't go back on it, also knowing her, Stevie would have never let me come back to her and to you. Besides, very quickly, she got back together with Lindsey and the next thing I know - they're getting married." He didn't look at Sara once after he saw her eyes starting to well up with tears. "I got really pissed off. I thought that some guy just breezed into what could have been mine."

"Wait a second. You just said you never thought about me, but now you're saying, that Dad breezed into what could have been yours?"

Sighing, Don shrugged. "When I found out about them, I wanted to raise hell. I wanted to go to Stevie and say that she had no right to allow some other man be a father to my child, that I..." Pausing for a moment. "That I changed my mind." Sara started crying, now realizing that her life could have turned out a lot different if Don had in fact done what he was talking about. "I sought advice from some of my closest friends and all of them said that I was crazy, that Stevie would never ever even talk to me about it, let alone let me into her life again. So, I gave up and tried to move on. I completely ignored the fact you were to come into this world. I heard about it, when you were born, but... I don't know, by then I just didn't think of you as mine anymore, seeing how Lindsey had been around for the whole pregnancy and clearly, he was stepping into the father's role."

"So, everything mother said... it's all a lie. You wanted me and you tried, but she didn't let you." Hearing what she wanted to hear, Sara said. 

"Well, not exactly, but partially." 

"I don't understand what I've done wrong." Sobbing, she looked at her father. "She must hate me for something, why does she insist on lying to me?" 

Don wasn't sure how to respond. Sara was taking everything in not exactly the right way, but... Stevie had hurt him too, by running back into Lindsey's arms so quickly, without even waiting for him to come around. There were two options; he could either make Sara realize how it all truly happened or he could stay silent and let her took it in the way she thought it happened, judging by what he just told her.

And Don chose to keep his mouth shut, reaching out to take Sara's hand, comforting her...