Deja Vu.

4. (Not) A party girl.

Ashley pov.

I don't really know why I keep doing this... this façade. Come to a party, act like I'm having the best time of my life, get drunk, dance, talk to people, call everybody attention. I guess I do it because it's what everyone expects from me. Being the most popular girl of the school, the girlfriend of the football star, also most popular guy, comes with those sorts of requirements.

I never tall anybody about how much I actually hate it. Not even to my best friend, Bella, or my boyfriend, Jason. They all think what I want them to think, in this case that I'm the wildest party girl in history. As if.

I walk through the room with a red cup of cherry vodka on my hands. People smile at me and try to get my attention when I pass by them. I smile and ignore them, while I look for Jason.

Ugh, of course I will find him playing beer pong. If you ask me the worst part of parties are the damn games. I mean, come on, if you really want to get drunk or kiss somebody; you just go man up and do it. But obviously nobody thinks the same.

I put the biggest smile possible and find my way to my boyfriend. He is blond hair is all sweaty, and his blue eyes are bloodshot. He can barely stands without falling of how drunk he is.

When he notices me he instantly put his arm in my waist, and kisses my temple.

- There you are. Want to play?

- No, umm, I think already have too much for now. – I said and try my best to look a little sick.

- You don't look so well. Do you want us to go or something?- he ask while passing a hand through my hair.

-hell, yes!

I want to say. But if I go then everybody is going to wonder why I leaved. Then the rumors of what could have happened will begin.

"Oh, I think they were trying to get some alone time if you know what I mean."

"Oh, I heard that she's pregnant and that's why she left."

"He cheated on her, and when she found out, she run out of the house and he follows her. They never came back."

I know its sound like I'm overreacting, but it's true. People in high school seem to have the wildest imagination of all.

- No, it's okay. I'm just going to sit somewhere. – I replied instead.

- You sure? – He doesn't look so convinced

- I'm sure.

- Okay. I'll go find you in a bit. – He said and gives me a small kiss on my lips.

I smile at him and nod.

I walk to a small corner of the room and sit at the couch. I know I shouldn't do this. Show them for a second the real me. The one who will much rather be at home by herself reading a book, or lying in the bed talking to her friends or Jason. But I'm so damn tired. This is the third party in the week I have to attend. I just don't have it on me to keep faking it, I need a fucking break.

I sit like that for a few more minutes, until Bella finds me. She has her red hair on a ponytail and her makeup still on point, like she doesn't just spend the last couple of hours on a party full of sweating people pressing their bodies to hers while dancing. Her brow eyes are highlighted with a thick line of black eyeliner and her lips look a little bigger with that red lipstick.

Her white tight dress assents all of her curves. God, I will kill for a body like that. Not that mine isn't good or anything, but let's just say that the long hours she spend on the gym are totally worth it.

She sits next to me and hugs me.

- What are you doing in here? I looked for you everywhere. And I mean, everywhere. – she said with wide eyes and giggle.- I even went to the rooms upstairs and find couples really... busy. Ups.

- I was here. – I laugh and state the obvious.

- Yes, here hiding. Why, though? You love the attention. – She looks like she's talking more to herself than to me. She is really wasted.

- I'm not hiding. I was just I little sick, that all.

- It's that so? – She looks at me and rice a brow.

- Yeah. – I narrow my eyes at her, not getting where she want to get.

- Oh, yeah. I mean I will really get sick too if I not drink anything at all. –she points to my full cup.

I look at the cup and then at her with my mouth open. Fuck. She smiles at me. I recover quickly and smile back.

- It's like my 8eth cup.

- Mhm. Of course, it is. – She rolled her eyes and takes my arm. –come on, bitch. The night still young.

I guess my break it's over, time to bring the party girl back.

I give her a wide smile and follow her to the dance floor, where be dance.

People say you can have whatever you want if you try hard enough. I believe that's true. But I also believe that everything comes with a price. This is one of mine. And most of the time I think it's worth it.

So worth it, I mean all I have to do is pretend to be someone else sometimes, do things that I dislike. No such big deal, especially if the price is my friends and Jason.

Sometimes, though, I wonder if they will still love me if they knew the real me. Are they really my friends if the only thing we do together it's the thing I hate the most? Will Jason still be in love with me if he knew all of me instead just a part?

STOP.

He does know me, he does love. So, do my friends.

I keep repeating that to myself like a mantra on my insides. While I smile and dance with Jason and Bella on the outside.

He does. They do.

0Bj5Wz5۳