Chapter 26 - Back Two Back

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SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 24

7:01am, my tambo, lying in bed

During the ceremony last night, I broke through the pain. All the stars were hiding and it was a little eerie when I entered Otillia's house. When the ceremony began, it was very dark outside and thick clouds covered the sky. I walked past the lit candle in the middle of the room in a small metal dish with two pieces of smoldering wood that filled the room with a thin layer of smoke.

The wood is called Palo Santo, and Joshua told me it's burned for both its smell (like you would burn incense), and also to spiritually cleanse the energy of the room—I presumed we were using it for the latter.

When I settled in a sitting position, with my Thai flag next to me with my written intention on it, I watched the shadows flickering around the room. They made distorted shapes on the wooden walls, and when someone walked in front of it to take their shot of Ayahuasca, there would be one giant shadow.

We all were sitting with our backs against one of the four walls and Otillia was sitting at the head of the room in her rocking chair. After pouring herself a shot, she closed her eyes and sat silently for a moment. Upon opening her eyes, she stood up and softly walked towards the middle of the room to blow out the candle.

Her large white dress rippled in the light from the candle when she bent over, and the room became instantly silent and very dark when she blew it out. There were no stars, no moon, and even the sounds of the jungle seemed to be muted.

I couldn't see or hear her when she walked back to her chair, but I heard the plastic squeak when she sat down in her rocking chair. The ceremony begun and I sat there in the dark. The only noise I could hear was the occasional sound of someone shifting in their seat.

At the beginning of the ceremony, nobody knows how the Ayahuasca will react, for them or anyone else. Even though I couldn't see anybody else in the dark room, I could sense overtones of apprehension within the group. We were sitting there and waiting for the Ayahuasca to do its magic, wrapped in the darkness of the night.

Before anything happened, enough time had passed for me to enter a state of internal calmness. I had been practicing my breathing techniques, trying to enter calm and meditative states for as long as possible during these ceremonies. I tried to observe, instead of control, my Ayahuasca experiences.

Without warning, an explosion of sound and light shook the entire house. The startling interruption made someone gasp, and I heard a quick squeal from somebody else.

The sky crackled to life. I knew at that moment why long ago people thought thunder was the sound coming from the gods fighting.

When it's that bright, and that loud, and so close it's right on top of you, there's no escaping it. I imagined Zeus hurling thunderbolts towards the Earth.

The small room became lit again and again by blasts of purple light. Thunder exploded at the same instant as the lightning flashed and I knew the storm was right on top of us. It shook the wooden house with every strike towards the Earth and I could feel the sky's energy pouring into the room.

Through the door, I could see the jungle illuminated with each white-hot flash of light. The room was still electrified and loud when the Ayahuasca began to start working. People started to vomit, Otillia started singing icaros, and the sounds became mixed together.

The wind and rain, the violent sound of people purging, the rhythm of the chakapa, the smooth sound of Otillia singing, but none of it compared to the power of the thunder and lightning.

I can't remember exactly how long we sat there, or the specifics of what happened those first few hours. All I know is that I had a great time lying back and watching nature's fireworks.

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