The Real Me || Book One

Chapter four: Liar

A few days later...

Adrien's POV

Liar... She called me a liar... I couldn't think about anything except for that one little word. That measly word created so much destruction to our friendship, and I was to blame. I didn't know what to say to her before she left, so I let her go.

I've had a few days to think about what happened, but that one word remained in my brain, haunting me day and night. I've come to a conclusion; I need to let Marinette go... She wants nothing to do with me and if I keep holding on to her, I'm going to lose myself as well. She obviously doesn't love me any more, so why should I give my love to a girl who doesn't even want it? Maybe I'm over thinking this a little. I shouldn't let such a small thing control most of my mind, but it's winning.

"Adrien?" Lucas waved his hand over my face to get my attention.

"Hm?" I lift my chin from my hand and look at my room mate.

"Did you hear a word I said?" He asks, and chuckles. I shake my head as my cheeks began to feel hot.

"Eileen and I are going out tonight, so you'll be here alone."

I nod. "Don't worry about me. I'm use to being alone."

Lucas 'fake' slaps his forehead.

"I'm sorry, Adrien. I didn't mean it like that."

"Don't be. I know what you meant." I smile at him reassuringly.

Lucas and I had become great friends in the few weeks we've known one another. Even though we hadn't known each other long, it feels like we grew up together. He could tell what I was thinking by just looking at me. (It was mostly about Marinette.)

Eileen was his high school sweetheart, they stayed together through everything that life threw at them. I didn't know much about Eileen, hell, I didn't even know what she looked like. Lucas has wanted me to meet her since day one, but I've always put it off since Marinette was here.

No matter what I think about, I always come back to her... My head is telling me that I don't need her, yet my heart is telling me that she's the one for me. Love is confusing... One minute, you're in the clouds, happy as can be, then the next, you're in pure hell, wishing that you could get out. I don't want to get over Marinette, but if it's what I have to do, then that's it.

"Maybe you could finally meet Eileen!" Lucas stands up and stretches his legs.

"Yeah, maybe." I gaze down at my trembling hands, and so does Lucas.

"Adrien?" He slowly walks over to me, cautious.

"I-I can't stop..." I whisper.

"Adrien, what's wrong?" He kneels in front of, worried.

I shake my head. "No..."

"Adrien!"

I start to shake my head over and over again, causing me to grow a massive headache. Lucas put his hands on my shoulders, trying to stop me from harming myself any more than what I've already done. I couldn't stop the shaking in my body. I felt no control of anything. I felt like I was shutting down...

The shaking grew worse. It was clearly visible, there was no hiding it. Lucas tried his best to calm me down, but nothing he said or did worked. Why was I shaking so much?
There's no liable explanation for this, so why can't I stop it?

I stood up, my hands shaking uncontrollably, and Lucas moved out of the way. I didn't know what I was capable of, so I stayed away from him. I moved to the window, to get fresh air, but it didn't work.
I slowly turned around, trying to control myself.