"Oh c'mon Leo, I'll be fine. Stop stressing out so much."
"No. Anto.. You need to stop being so careless.. What if that little kid hit your tummy huh?" Leo says laying his head gently on her growing stomach
"Leo.. " she giggles
"I'm sorry. I just.. I want you to be okay and I could not live with myself if anything happened to you. "
"Hey.. Listen.. I'll be okay," she smiles looking at him lovingly
He looks up at her, smiling. This is where he belongs. He can't believe that this is actually happening. He's looking up at the most beautiful girl in the entire world. And not only that, this wonderful woman is also holding the most beautiful gift anyone could ever ask for.
"He's gonna be a handsome boy," she smiles
Lionel looks down at her stomach, rubbing it soothingly.
"Hopefully he takes your features then," he chuckles
"I feel like he's gonna look like you."
Lionel smiles. A beautiful replica of their love. Nothing could be more wonderful than that.
Their life is very simple but he likes it like they. He likes the simple things. He likes feeling safe. And even though a child wasn't in their plans, it feels safe. It feels good.
The fact that they're both young, maybe too young, is challenging. But they will not let it get in between their plans. They will still finish college together and they will live a wonderful life with a wonderful baby. Everything will be okay.
//
"Ah! L-Leo! It hurts!!!"
It had been snowing like crazy and they couldn't go to the hospital. Her mother was there to help, but Antonella was in extreme pain. Lionel didn't know what to do.
"Sh. It's okay baby. I'm right here. You're okay."
Her screams drove him crazy. He didn't know what to do and it made him want to cry. He felt so helpless.
Many, many hours later and Antonella was still screaming in a lot of pain. Lionel looked drained and pale, but would not leave her side.
Finally, he looks up after hearing a soft cry. He smiles hysterically once he sees his beautiful baby boy in the hands of his girlfriend's mother.
He's in slight shock. He's too overwhelmed. He freezes for a while. He's brought back to reality when he is being handed his child.
"Hey.. Anto.. Look.. Have you seen him? Our baby.. He's so beautiful. You were right.. I think he'd going to look like me. You're always right," he says chocking up a bit
"Ah... H-he's.. B-beautiful.." She says almost out of breath
"Are you tired? Don't go to sleep.. Look.. Look at him.. God he's amazing. This is our beautiful child.. "
He continues to talk, trying to keep her awake. He's afraid that if she goes to sleep, she will not wake up. So he shakes her and tries to get her excited.
"Leo.. I love you."
"I-I.. I love you too.. I love you so much Anto.. So so much you don't even know.. When I met you.. I knew I wanted you to be with me forever. I knew I wanted a life with you."
She smiles, holding his hand as tightly as she can. She looses her grip soon and he holds on tighter.
"Please.. Please.. I know if you go to sleep you will never wake up again. Please.. Please.. Stay awake."
"I'm tired Leo."
"Anto.. Don't say that.. Please don't say that! Anto!! ANTO!!!"
///
"D-don't touch me!"
Lionel has not left his bed ever since his girlfriend died. He hasn't even looked at his son.
He wants to go to sleep. He wants to fall asleep and find her in his dreams. But he never does. He never finds her. He finds an empty room and a voice he doesn't recognize.
"Leo.. Get up. Your son needs you."
"Why.. Why did she leave me? Huh? Why!? Why the fuck did she leave me!?!?"
"Leo.. Hey.. Things happen okay? Life happens. "
"Life sucks,"
"I know," his best friend chuckles
"I don't wanna go Ger."
"It's her funeral.. The least you can do is show up."
"Okay," Lionel says
He doesn't speak. He just watches everyone speak beautiful things about her. But he doesn't. And everyone sorta understands him. He had so much to say, though. But he didn't want to.
Those were things that were between them. And they would stay between them forever. No one would ever be able to understand. And he didn't want anyone to. If someone did, then those things wouldn't be theirs anymore. They would be sharing them with another human.
He hated the idea of someone understanding their love and everything they did and said to each other. He wanted something that only the two of them could share.
//
"Okay, you ready? Of course you are?" Leo chuckles
"Can't believe you're moving," Gerard says
"You should come visit soon," Leo smiles
"I will, I will."
"Okay then.. I'm gonna grab Thiago."
"Will you be okay?"
"Of course."
"Okay.. Good. I'm glad."
"Stop being such a mom and help me carry his things," Leo says
"Alright alright. Why does he look so much like you anyway?" Gerard chuckles
"What? I think he's cute!"
"Cause he looks like you!"
"Exactly."
Gerard laughs even louder. Lionel likes the way his best friend laughs. It's contagious. He likes contagious laughs like his. They make him think that there is joy even after going through hell and more.
