Feelings

Gone

*Felix Pov*
I drop my knife and I stared at the lifeless body. I couldn't believe my eyes, no I couldn't believe what just happened. I look over to Grif crying and Carolina looking away trying to stay strong. I just say there emotionless, just staring at the body. I looked over at Locus who just stander there staring. I got up and started walking away to leave there dead friend in there hands.

*Tucker Pov last nightmare*
I remember dreaming of me hurting my friends because of rage. I didn't want to hurt them my rage and sadness blinded me. I watched myself kill all my friends one by one. I couldn't take it anymore so I grabbed the gun and shot myself. I saw nothing but darkness. No dream or nightmare just darkness. I was relieved and happy that all those nightmare were over.

*Carolina Pov*
I watch Simmons trying to drag or even push Grif back. Grif of course started to fight back but what broken my heart the most was what he was shouting. "COME BACK TO ME" "WHY DID YOU DO IT" "WHY DID YOU BETRAY OUR FRIENDSHIP". The last one hit me the hardest "we never said goodbye.....it feels like you abandoned us...feels like you got up and left...goodbye". I looked down not wanting to watch Grif struggle to run to him.

*Simmons Pov*
I was crying with Grif but not because of him but because Grif was making it hard to forget. I just want to forget everything and pretend he was still alive. I could feel happy memories coming back but I kept pushing them away. I look over at everyone there and I could see they all are pushing them back as well.
"Guys...." I said catching their attention "we gotta let him go"
I watch everyone drop to their knees and start crying from sorrow or from anger. I let Grif go so he can see him one last time.

*Memory...all pov except Locus and Felix*
It was Tucker birthday but nobody knew that until caboose found a calendar Tucker had hidden away. Everyone wanted to make him a surprise birthday party which we did but the reaction we got was unexpected. We all watch Tucker started crying and that was the first time we saw him cry.
"What's wrong" Grif asked
"It's just" he choked out from his cry "nobody ever done this for me"
"Your our friend" Carolina said "why wouldn't we?"
Tucker fell silent then look down "cause today is the day.....I-...I....never mind"
"Tell us" Grif spoke up first
Tucker just shakes his head so we all respected that and continue with the party. We were happy Tucker was able to enjoy his party but when the night fell. He wasn't anymore but Wash cheered him up. Telling him to forget it about and start new fresh memories and he did.

*another memory*
We watch Tucker and Wash argue about sleeping naked. We all learned that Tucker slept naked and Wash didn't know so he came into Tucker room unexpectedly receiving the sight. We all were woken up by Wash telling his to put on some clothes so we all rushed over. Carolina noticed that Wash was trying hard not to look down and stare. That's how Carolina knew he wasn't Straight but for the rest it went past them like a train. We all just threw blankets on Tucker to cover himself up which he did while saying something stupid.
"Bow Chicka Bow Wow" Tucker smirked and we all rolled our eyes
"Tucker just shut up and stop sleeping naked" Wash sighed
"Never" Tucker snapped and they continue arguing
We all just went to bed well try to go to bed which was impossible. We just changed into our armor and continue the day like usually we do.

*last happy memory for everyone but Carolina and Wash*
"Smile" Donut said setting the timer up and run up to us
We were all taking a group picture cause why not. We kept retrying until the forty picture came out right. Grif, Simmons, Sarge, Church, Caboose, Tucker, Donut, Doc, and Junior were in the picture. That day we received a memo about us relocating. Church did his best to hide where he was going from Caboose but he found out anyways. Tucker was happy he gets to go with Junior. We all packed and said our goodbyes only to not say them because what's the point if we are going to see each other again soon.

*Caboose Pov*
Sarge didn't let me go and see what's happening but I knew someone died. I didn't know who but I'm glad I don't. When Grif shouted the name out I could feel myself break into a bunch of pieces. I pushed Sarge away really hard and ran toward Grif shouting to find him dead. I started to cry and shout his name out and tackles his dead body hugging it. I hugged him close and sang the song he always sang to me when I asked him. I felt guilty, I felt angry, I felt sad, and I felt lost. I didn't let go until they had to pry me off with the help of everyone in the army. I watch Carolina drag the one person who loved him as he cried in sorrow. I couldn't take it anymore I had to say it, I had to blame someone.
"WHY?!" I shouted "WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE!!.....WHY COULDN'T YOU STAY AND BE HAPPY WITH US!....WHY!.....WHY!!!"
I couldn't stop crying, I couldn't stop yelling but what did stop was my broken heart. I wanted to join him but what was the point, what if we go different direction.

*Kimball Pov*
I felt sorry for the sims troops and freelancers. I couldn't imagine how bad they feel about the death of one of their friends. I look at Carolina watching her calm down a lover who lost his love one. I wanted to help but I didn't want to get involve in their friendship. I walked back to my men to announce who died.

*Washington Pov*
I couldn't stop crying, I couldn't stop sobbing, I couldn't stop blaming myself, and I couldn't stop thinking. It should have been me, not him but me. I kept replaying it over and over again watching him die. He turned the gun and shot himself in the heart killing himself instantly. I wanted to hold his body close to mine to feel his warmth one last time but I couldn't bring myself to do that. I hugged Carolina tightly not wanting to let go. I could feel the cold breeze hit me gently giving me the shiver. I got up and walked over to his lifeless body.
"Goodbye.....Tucker" I whispered softly only himself could hear him