Bechloe

All By My Lonesome

Beca POV
It was spring break. I get most of the campus all to myself. What fun. Weirdest thing is that Kimmy Jin actually talked to me.
"Have a good spring break." She says and I'm stunned for half a second but I give her a genuine smile, it might be small but it's genuine.
"Yeah, you too." She nods and leaves. The campus is quiet and empty. It's surprisingly peaceful. You would never think that a place always so noisy and full of life can become quiet and peaceful. I work at the radio station. I play my music at night. I think people actually enjoy it. I really, really miss Chloe. Even her stalker-ish moves and how handsy she was. I mean..I miss all the Bellas, not just Chloe. I also miss Amy, a lot. She's so going to kill me if I ever call her just Amy. Well..if I ever see her again..We go to the same college so I'll see her around. Maybe Chloe will even continue being my own personal stalker. I wouldn't mind it. Woah! Never thought I would have those thoughts. Weird.. I guess I'm lonely. Weird again. Man, those girls really got to me..

One of my first nights in the radio station for my night shift I saw the breakfast club movie. Maybe I should watch it? Jesse's a great guy and I don't want to lose him..but I don't want to be with him like that. Hopefully, this will appease him and I'll explain..maybe..in a couple of hundred years..

As I sit in my dorm, all by my lonesome, I watch The Breakfast Club. I didn't realise it would be this sad. As it ends I can't stop the tears sliding down my face. I quickly wipe them away and take deep breaths. I don't care if I'm alone, I'm not crying, I never cry. I can't help but laugh at myself. How absurd is it that I hate watching movies and find them boring and never finished them and here I am, crying over one. Never thought I'd see the day. I pack up and go to bed. This was stupid..

I stayed in touch with Chloe, I couldn't help it. With her on my mind so often and her being one of the few who wouldn't find it weird if we still talked. So we did, since it was Spring break it was mainly text but I was okay with that because we I can still see her when she gets back. I, of course, still talk to Amy. How could I not? She was my first friend in the Bellas and I oddly missed her weirdness, just like I oddly missed Chloe being handsy. So I was excited when she texted me, until I read what the text said. I was sitting on my bed. Listening to my music when I got it. At first I couldn't believe it but then I just stared at my phone. What the hell was I going to do?

I decided to try and make peace with Jesse and then maybe see my dad. He's a grown up, he should have some advice, right? I pluck up my courage and knock on the door. No answer. I smell popcorn.
"Jesse I know you're in there, I smell popcorn." More silence. "Jesse, come on. Open up." I knock again. Just as I think he's not going to answer the door opens.
"Hey..I tried..to call you..I left a bunch of messages." I say awkwardly. Okay, I tried to wimp out and talk to him over the phone.
"Yeah, I got them." Jesse says, voice flat and scratchy, it sounds like he's been crying. Okay, straight to the apology it is.
"I'm sorry that we fought. It's just..Aubrey makes me so mad and I overreacted and I'm just..Aubrey makes me crazy." Probably not the best apology ever.
"Seriously?" Uh oh.. "You think I'm mad because you yelled at me?" I look away from him.
"No, I know.."
"No you don't." He cuts me off. "You think you know but you don't. You push away anyone who could possibly care about you, why is that?" I wasn't expecting that.
"I don't know." I answer..honestly?
"Well, you better figure it out because I'm done..with whatever..this is.."
"Jesse.." I try to reason.
"I'm done." He says and shuts the door. Well, that didn't go as planed.. I guess to my dad it is..

I knocked on his door and he answered with a surprised look. He made me a drink and I went straight to the point.
"No one is more surprised then me but I..really liked those girls."
"And you thought the answer was to..leave?" He asks with a confused look.
"Seriously? You can say that to me?" I ask.
"Oh, come on Bec. That's so unfair. Look, your mum and I, we didn't work..but I tried so hard to make things right between us. But..you just..shut me out."
"Yeah, well, I shut everybody out, don't take it personally. It's just easier." I say, looking anyway but there.
"It's also really lonely." I look at him and see how sincere he's being. I do push everyone out. I wasn't being truthful to Jesse. It's just so much easier and I'm..I'm not going to get hurt if there's no body to hurt me.
"What do I do?" I ask him.
"Well, that's up to you." He answers. I guess it's time to listen to my heart and not my head. I've got to take some risks.

A/N
I'm sorry it's a slow and sorta sad but I had to right it. It's an important part of the movie/story. Again, I'll check grammar and everything later, sorry if the typing sucks some parts of it I was typing fast so please forgive me. I hope you enjoy and I'll have the next chapter out soon. It'll be happier, I promise.