Matt Espinosa Imagines

Broken Home (Part 1)

(Flashback based off of the song "Broken Home" by 5SOS)

I woke up, my body breaking in a sweat. The other side of the bed was cold and empty, the hollowness of where my husband had once lied. That's when I thought of everything of us I could remember, like the day I found him, well, actually, the day he found me.

I was ready to give up and run away, and I thought my life couldn't get any worse. I thought nobody cared, I thought I was invisible and a burden, but no. Matt showed me other wise.

The smell of him lingered in his pillow. I buried my face inside it. I let out a light sob, and thought of the day Matt saved my mind.

(Ten years ago - age 17)

It was eleven o'clock at night. I never felt more alone, it had seemed, anyway. I felt this way often, and the only thing to make me feel otherwise was Matt. But Matt, my rock, I had felt was annoyed with my constant neediness and sadness. I didn't want to bother him again, but I didn't know what else to do. It was already dark out, but my parents probably wouldn't care that I wasn't there; honestly, they wouldn't even notice. They were too busy screaming at each other in the kitchen to realize. I tried to help, but it only made things worse. So I packed my rucksack and l left, ignoring the light drizzle that soon soaked my body. The only shielding was from my hat, which had all my hair tucked underneath.

I had eventually found my way to his house. I pulled the key he gave me out of my pocket. I unlocked his door, kicking my wet shoes to the side. My socked feet crept around corners quietly. I stayed on my tiptoes until I made it into Matt's room. Matt tossed and turned in his bed, half awake and half asleep. I reached into Matt's closet, grabbing the spare pair of clothes I had stashed here. I peeled off my soaked tee shirt, hat, and sweats, throwing them into Matt's hamper.

I had known Matt for four years now, and he was my everything. He knew everything about me, and I knew everything about him. He accepted me and my flaws, loving them all individually. Though he always promised I never annoyed him, I was still worried I did. But I couldn't stay in that broken home anymore.

Matt heard me close his closet door, asking, "(Y/N), is that you?"

I sniffled, wiping away a tear. "Y-yeah, Matt, it's me."

"What's wrong tonight?" His tired voice asked with concern. "You never come at night unless it's really bad." His hand swiped up his phone off his bed-side table, flashing the light on me. I shielded my eyes.

"Matt, please don't." I spoke, holding my hand up. Instead, he flicked on his dimly lit lamp.

Now he was sitting up, patting the spot next to him. I climbed in, lying beside him. I tied my wet hair into a bun. His sweatshirt sleeve wiped my damp face.

"Matt, I don't know if I can take it anymore. I'm useless, I'm a waste of space."

"Stop, no you're not. Stop saying that right now, (Y/N)."

"But don't you get it? It's what they say! It's how they act! Every single night there's something crashing from them throwing things. I try to help, but they just yell at me. They scream and cry and threaten each other. I could never do that to my kid. You don't understand how it feels, Matty."

Thought Matt had known everything about me, including my parents, he only knew to an extent. I just always had said, 'they're arguing again,' but never anything in detail. I had a hard time opening up about that, and Matt respected that, but now I finally was about to tell him everything.

"It is my fault. Ever since the day I saw them. I was walking back from a few doors down, I had dog sat for Mrs. Smith while she went a few hours away from home. I guess he forgot, Dad, I mean. He was suppose to pick me up, but never did. I ended up walking home. Yeah it was only a little walk, but it started raining. I saw Dad's car sitting a few houses down , God knows how long he'd been there. I walked up to him, ready to complain about him forgetting me, when I saw her. Some slutty woman, tits hanging out of her butterfly button up top, making out with my dad. She had opened her eyes for a split second, looking right into my eyes. She stopped, shoved him off, and he looked at me. Makeup was running down my face, rain was soaking my hair. I was a mess, but that wasn't my biggest concern.

Dad rolled down his window, and I made my way over to it.

'Did you forget something?' I spat to him.

'(Y/N), I can explain, it's not–'

'You're a lying sack of shit, Dad. Do I have to call Bob's Whore Be Gone, or are you gonna take her back to Pimp Daddy Tony's Prostitute rental?' I said it as loud as I could so she could hear me.

It's been downhill ever since that day. Is it my fault? They act like it is, Matty. I wish I could just move out. Live with you, even."

My head snuggled into his side, his fingers running through my hair, brushing out the tangles. The feeling of someone playing with my hair was amazing. It calmed me down. He pressed his lips against my forehead, whispering against my skin.

"It's not your fault, babe." He moved his lips. "Sometimes, when people have problems, it's easy to blame, or take out their anger on the first thing they can. Unfortunately, that was you. They love you, (y/n), even though they take it out on you. It's not your fault. Your parents must have had problems for a while now without your knowing, so I'm sorry for that. Like I said, you're always welcome here, and as soon as I can get my own place, you'll be coming with me. And that's a promise."

---

"Momma?" A tiny voice broke me from my thoughts.

I looked up, a small smile playing on my lips. "Hey, Ryder... Are you okay?"

"I come see if you okay," he smiled a holy smile. He lost his first tooth last week, right before Matt left. "I heard you crying."

My three year old baby boy crawled into bed next to me, wearing his Spider-Man pajamas that his daddy had bought him.I quickly wiped away my tears.

"You miss Daddy again?" he asked sadly.

I nodded.

"Me, too, Momma," Ryder continued, running a hand through his light brown hair. He was the spitting image of Matthew. "But he'll be home soon, right?"

I kissed my son's chubby cheek, smiling. "The reunion tour just started, baby, but I think he'll be back quicker than we think."

Ryder cuddled into my chest, not knowing what his father had done for me the past years. Sure, he was Ryder's superhero, but Matt was also my superhero.

—Might do a part two which would occur after the night of the flashback 😏—