The history of Lames

2.4 ~ The Marauder Tower

"An enormous list appeared in the middle of the room as soon as Remus asked the question. It was their so-called "Greenlist". First Remus wanted to call it a blacklist, since apparently that was something muggles usually did, as his mother was a muggle, but Sirius was against it, his surname being Black. Then James suggested green, since it was the colour of evil if you asked him. The colour of the killing curse, the colour of Slytherin, the colour of the eyes that made him lose his heart... Yes, the colour green was seducing, but very dangerous. Therefor they now had a Greenlist with all the persons they liked to prank. On top was Snivellus Snape of course, but another name was climbing up the ladder. Sirius crawled towards the foot of his bed and frowned as Fabian Prewetts name was moving across the parchment.

'Guess most of us really want to prank that no-drink-buying-bastard Prewett. Such a shame that's not an option right now.' Remus shook his head in disapproval. He probably thought it was wrong of the boys to judge Prewett, while Evans already forgave him, but at this point Evans was just too good for this world.

'Sirius, why am I on place seven?' James suddenly asked. He was right. The name James Prongs Potter was standing in the upper section of the list, making Sirius mutter a few curse words under his breath. It hadn't been in his plan of action James would find out he wanted to prank him before being pranked at all.

'I don't know, mate. Maybe it's about those comments in the Three Broomsticks. Here, Evans is just below you. The list must know I didn't like those comments, at all. But don't worry; I wasn't planning to prank you anytime soon. Why don't we prank that idiotic Defence Against the Dark Arts professor of ours, Crayon. He's on place four and I heard he gave an T to a first year Hufflepuff, just because he has muggles as parents and therefor asked a "stupid" question in his opinion.' Sirius knew this would guide away everyone's attention of the fact Sirius was indeed planning a prank on poor Prongs. Everyone immediately agreed on pranking Crayon. Even Remus didn't have any protest, which meant the professor definitely deserved an awful, humiliating and hilarious Marauder prank.

'Problem is, what are we gonna do to him? I really don't feel like getting caught by that bastard,' James said promptly. Though getting caught was almost never something they wanted to happen, they usually didn't really mind. It was part of being a Marauder, though it were mostly James and Sirius who got caught, since they were less careful than Remus and Peter, but none of them made a problem of it.

'We never want to get caught...' Peter mumbled before the others could start asking questions.

'I know, but I don't trust this guy. It's just... I even wonder why Dumbledore hired him. The only reason I could think of is to keep an eye on him. I talked about it with my dad and, well, he doesn't trust it as well.'

'All the more reason to prank him, though,' Remus cut in. 'If your suspicions are valid, it would mean he is a death eater or at least something related to a death eater.' Sirius couldn't agree more. Death eaters actually deserved a lot more than just pranks, a lifetime in Askaban for example. They weren't in the position to make that happen, though, at least not yet, so pranking was the best option.

'True, we need a perfect plan. Anyone has any ideas?' James was the last one to speak for quite some time. The Marauders always held these moments of silence, thinking of possible pranks. It were the only moments Sirius actually enjoyed silences.

It was Peter who was the first one to speak.

'James, what about that dancing thing you told me about a few weeks ago? That sounded funny.' Dancing thing you read about? James? Sirius didn't even know James could dance, let along he told Peter something funny related to dancing. Besides, James never read something out of free will, unless it was Quidditch or prank related or about something to help his friends. Noting about what Peter said sounded logical or even like James Potter.

'Dude, what the hell is Wormtail talking about?' James opened up his mouth and closed it again. Then he moved towards Peter and nudged him, making the poor boy squeak like a scared little pig.

'I told you not to say anything about that, Wormtail! Especially not to Sirius,' he huffed, before taking his original position on his bed, nervously fussing up his already messed up hair with his hands. 'So, I read something about some weird dance muggles invented, with idiotic moves and sounds. A bit like a cavemen. We could make him do that after hearing a specific word. Something everyone uses, but not all the time, so that every time he hears that, he goes all crazy dancing and singing.' Sirius clapped in his hands, thinking that was a great plan. It was only then he realised James still hadn't told them where he got this information about muggle dances and why he even knew something like this in the first place.

'Prongs, why in the name of Merlins fluffy Christmas sweater do you even know this?' Sirius asked after his eyes met Remus', finding out he was thinking the exact same thing. Again James messed up his hair.

'Well, I'm pretty sure you will hate me for this. I was planning to tell you when we make it to the final game against Slytherin, because... well, I got this great idea. It's the perfect strategy, only you will most definitely not like it.' Okay, that wasn't a good sign. James usually had quite normal strategies, unlike the Slytherins who just tried to kill everyone who got in their way. They always looked more like they were on a killing mission than playing Quidditch, while the Gryffindors actually played the game.

'Just get it over with please,' Sirius muttered, not sure if he wanted to know what crazy plan his best friend came up with.

'Okay, we barely won from Slytherin and we had loads of injuries after the game. They are much better than Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, so if we finally make it to the final for once, we probably have to play against Slytherin and they are going to try to hit us even harder. We need an advantage and that's when I got the idea. I figured they know nothing about muggle strategies, you know, from muggle sports.' Well, it at least started out interestingly. Sometimes Sirius wondered how James came up with these creative ideas related to Quidditch. Without James as a captain he was pretty sure they would never have beaten Slytherin.

'I found something about an Australian tradition. They have these dances inspired at cavemen people, well I'm not quite sure actually, but this weird dance was to scare and intimidate their opponents before the game. A bit like what teams sometimes do at the world cup, only then a lot less pretty and weird. I figured, since it's a muggle tradition, it could give us an advantage, since the Slytherins definitely won't know about this, those narrow minded purebloods.' Sirius mouth dropped. What a complete moran! He was insane if he thought the Gryffindor team would do this. Brilliant, wicked, but definitely insane.

'That's actually a great idea, Prongs. They'll probably never expect you to do something like that and therefor will be flabbergasted ánd confused.' Wait, did Remus just agree with this weird plan of James, even though he isn't even in the team?

'Wait, wait, wait. I am not gonna dance around like a cavemen! We can use the dance for the prank, but I am against this Quidditch strategy of yours.' He barely got the chance to finish his sentence. It seemed James practiced convincing his best mate.

'Think about it, Pads. If we confuse the Slytherin team, you can take out Wilkes before they can send him after us. When they don't have their greatest physical power, they have to win due to actual Quidditch talent and we all know they are way less talented than the Gryffindor team!' Well, he clearly thought about it a great deal of time and Sirius had to admit taking out Wilkes would be a great way to end the sixth Quidditch season at Hogwarts. Besides, Sirius always looked hot. No matter what idiotic plan he was carrying out. He wasn't going to give in just yet, though. First Prongs had to convince the others and that wasn't the most important thing on their list right now. They weren't even in the finals yet.

'Well, let's discuss that with the rest of the team. Maybe I'll give in then, but right now all I have to say is "no way". Besides, we have a prank to plan.' Peter bit his lip, looking from Sirius to James, probably wondering if the latter already forgave him. The grin on James' face said enough: the boy always knew when he had won a battle even though his opponent didn't know it yet. Sirius decided to ignore it and instead turned his head towards Remus, who was about to open his mouth and say something.

'We have indeed. Prongs, why don't you tell us a bit more about that Australian dance thing?'"