Diary of an African child in Africa!

When I get a Crush

Its been so long since I posted something here ugh! Feel like I've lost it. And this post is kind of different from the others because it's about this guy I like *hides face* lol Some people will call me brave for doing this but nah I'm just really dumb to be honest.

Anywho berries, here goes my story... I have a crush
on this guy with the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen, and this incredible smile, and if I could make a list of everything,
I would do it but not today. Yes, it's corny and exaggerated. But it's not cliche because he knows. He knows because my demon friends told him.

It all happened a couple of weeks ago, I was standing by the cafeteria with my Judas friends when we started talking about my crush. They all knew I was totally in love with this guy so when they saw him walking by they decided to call him and tell him. Of course I was nervous as hell and out of crippling insecurity I bolted up these flights of stairs and ran towards the end of the building where I ran down some more stairs and sprinted to the deserted back of the school where I waited for 10 minutes for the coast to clear.

Then I had to go back upstairs because I remembered that I had promised to study with some people. On my way back I kept looking over my shoulder like a hundred times till I got to this class where my friends were waiting and guess who else was there? -.-

Lol I wanted the earth to open up, swallow me and spit me out in the deep areas of the village as I walked past him and took a seat amongst my friends. He was at one end of the room and my friends were at the other end. After a while, he got up and started walking towards us and I panicked. Whenever I panick I always fake a phone call, so there I was talking to myself on the phone while he stood behind me doing lord knows what. He stood there for like 2 minutes and my friends kept nudging me violently mouthing, "he's behind you!" And I just continued having this full blown conversation with myself on the phone.

When he left I felt so awful. I don't know if I should've said something or how I could have even gone about it. Then it made me realise that having a crush sucks!

It's like I was totally normal-ish a couple of weeks ago and now I'm even embarrassing myself in front of myself. I can't remember the exact moment it hit me but all of a sudden it just got impossible to get him out of my head.

To everyone else he's not that special, he's just one more human being they get to talk to, laugh with and then just walk away and it's not something worth remembering. But the way my ears perk up when I hear someone mention his name, hear him speak, see or maybe, just maybe- if I'm lucky- feel his meaningless touch on my skin because there's no length I wouldn't go to accidentally on purpose run into him, I save every second of it in my memory to replay it over and over in my head.

Having a crush is the most awkwardly mortifying, juvenile feeling on earth. From nowhere you just find yourself wanting to experience this gratifying sentiment of getting to know your crush. It gets super easy for you to quickly notice the way they do everything. And you've memorized this person's features like a pro along with the ability to keep your eyes on them without quite being able to look at them straight in the eye. You weigh the possibilities and imagine what it'd be like if they were more than a crush. And when you think too hard about the whole situation you begin to wonder if it's something about you-something about your flaws, wondering how he can not possibly get it.

Whenever he's close I get butterflies. I kind of skipped this stage because people keep stealing my pens at school but I often find myself wanting to write our names next to each other just to see how it'd look but I imagine myself being so overwhelmed with shame that I'd probably burn the paper, the pen and the building I was writing in just to destroy the evidence.

I cant remember the exact moment but I think the madness
started the moment you walked past me in those white shorts of yours. Did you have a disease or something?

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Hey Guy! Hehe I'm so going to regret posting this, I can just feel it. I don't know why I thought it'd be a good idea to try and declare my love this.. publically. But I missed Wattpad and I love writing about experiences and stuff. Hope you enjoyed reading this your comments and likes are highly appreciated. Feel free to suggest a topic for the next update x
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