Here Comes the Sun | ✓

Chapter Thirty-Seven - Liam

Chapter Thirty-Seven - Liam

FALL

It's Jere's third week back at school, the first grade, and not having him within arms-reach gives me the type of loneliness I try to avoid by all means. Without Libby around to hold my hand at least once more, or surprise me with a casual peck on the cheek, Jere has been my everything. He always has been, but now I think he's starting to see me as overbearing and possibly annoying.

The sound of Libby's name has been lost on my lips for two months now, but everyone else has conversations about her like she's never left.

Have you heard from Libby? How is she? Is she going to that college? The one her dad wanted her to go to, or the one she actually wants to go to? What is Texas like? How's her mom?

I'm on my way back to the shop while these thoughts come to mind. These questions haven't been asked, besides the first one - and the answer is plain: No. No, she has not reached out to any of us since she's been gone. It's like we're now nothing compared to the grand scheme of things - just like her father said.

I hope she's happy.

Maybe she has a boyfriend now. One that smiles at her like she's the world, and doesn't make pitiful deals with her father for information on their dead parents. If they're even dead at all.

Cal has called, but I've never answered - even with the possibility of it being Libby, I try to avoid picking up the phone with that caller-ID.

I've thought about a lot of things over the last two months, and have remembered every moment, every touch she gave me in her presence.

And I've come to realize that her dad was right - she deserves better than everything we can offer her in our world.

And I think she's finally realized that, too.

*

I didn't know Bentley was sick until the first day we had the courage of going to Cornelia's again.

"Wanna go grab coffee with me?" he asks me one day while I'm in the back room, trying to clean and sort out the disheveled pile of CD cases and vinyls for once. I don't hear his question at first, as he asked from the front counter of the shop, but when he shuffles up to the door and asks again, I can't help think about the last time I went there with him - the day I met Libby.

I hesitate, but the look in his chalky gray eyes tells me that it's not a question on whether I'm going or not. Nodding, I stand up from my position on the floor and follow him out of the closet and to the front counter where my bag is kept. 

"Is everything okay, Bentley?" I can't help but ask as we exit the store together, him locking the door as we're the only employees who work here.

I haven't noticed anything out of the ordinary about him, but now that we're talking one-on-one for the first time in a while, I begin to notice the changes. The way he walks - it's more of a slower shuffle; the way he breathes - faster, almost a wheeze; the way he talks - his voice more cracked than its usual hoarseness. 

But he only says, "Let's wait 'til we get some coffee in our system before we talk 'bout this crap," and continues to slowly shuffle beside me. This doesn't alarm me at all.

As our feet pat against the cool pavement and the wind blows us a small breeze, I'm reminded once again of how it's no longer summer. It's almost every day that I have to convince myself to be in the here-and-now, but... how can I do that when everything is so shitty these days?

Jimmy is bringing a guy over for dinner tonight to meet "The Family" (A.K.A., Jere and me); Jere is on the Honor Roll's list for the first grading period; Debby is coming over to the shop more frequently, towing behind home-cooked meals for my house; and Bentley is... well, he's about to tell me, it seems.