Chapter 1

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Picture above is of Krishna's

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Picture above is of Krishna's. She's not just as glamorous as the model but you get the idea. :)

Normal people are asleep. It's two in the morning and normal people are dreaming.

I am wide awake, my comforter wrapped around me as I surf through Netflix for another movie to watch. I am not normal people.

Sometimes I wish I could be. Normal. I know the spelling: N-O-R-M-A-L. I know its meaning, but somewhere between the beginning of junior year and the night I can't remember, I lost the essence of it.

Maybe Godzilla will finally put me to sleep or maybe it will be the evil Jack trying to kill his family that does the trick. When I do fall asleep in an unlikely scenario, my dreams are always a sliver of reality and blurred images. Nothing happens except for loud noises punctuated by murky colors. Sometimes I hear a scream, but it's far away. And then the demon creeps in. It's it that I am afraid of. Sometimes it slips out of my nightmares and into my reality, lying and waiting to catch me.

A sharp knock comes echoes through the room and I jump out of my skin.

Are the demons getting braver? I ask myself as I look around for the source. Maybe I'll die as a cliché with a hand coming out of my bed and dragging me under.

Then there comes another sound, this time from the general direction of the windows. The drawn curtain keeps me from seeing who or what is outside.

Knock, knock, knock. It comes in taps of three. I can't be imagining it.

I glance at the door to see if Mom heard it, too. If she did, she will come running. But there's no sign of Mom. She hasn't been at my door for the last two weeks - not since I had that meltdown. But, in my defense, even I need a break sometime.

I mute the TV and consult my personal decision maker - the magic 8 ball that rolls around at my feet. I move it around in my hand, testing its weight, and then give a firm shake.

I have been making all my decisions by my magic 8 ball since that night. It's reliable and predictable and makes my life less confusing.

No, I plead.

Without a doubt, it answers me. I swear this 8 ball is trying to fuck me over.

I slowly drag my leg over the mattress and stand up. Right when I think whoever it is outside is gone, there's another knock.

This is the only rule that I always make good on - no matter what happens, I always listen to my magic 8 ball. Even if the results are undesirable, like braving the crowd in the cafeteria or going to the counselor's office.

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