6 feet down

Chapter 18

AN: just a random note saying that I love each and every one of you guys :)

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APRIL'S POV

I leaned my head back against the branch and studied the beautiful pink leafs. Some were full grown, and some were still sprouting. I admired the branches that pointed in all directions.

I noticed something purple reflecting the sunlight. I came into realization that it was my old razor from when I was 14.

~~~FLASHBACK (YES, ANOTHER ONE)~~~

"Why don't you just go and kill yourself"

"Nobody wants you here"

"Just stop trying"

Their words would not leave my mind. I heard the taunts of Tara and Gina as they replayed through my mind. I just couldn't take it anymore.

I got up off of my bed and walked into my bathroom. I opened my cabinet and took out a razor that I had somehow gotten my hands on a few months ago, but had never used yet.

"Am I really gonna start?" I think to myself. I ponder if I should start cutting, knowing that one I start, it will be hard to stop.

But then the words replay in my mind again "just die you dumb slut"

"Well, it couldn't hurt anymore than what they say" I say to myself and bring the razor to my arm.

I take a deep breath and push the blade into my wrist. I yelp as the sharp pain runs through my arm. Even though the pain is horrible, it feels so good to let out all my emotion.

A moan escapes my lips as I pull the blade out and start another cut. The Blood is already dripping down my hand and onto the floor when the door suddenly bursts open.

"Hey, mom want to know if-" My twin brother Niall stopped what he was saying and dropped his can of soda when he saw me.

I looked over to see his face. It expressed full shock. "A-A-April?" His innocent voice murmured.

I instantly started bawling and pulled the razor out of my arm. I sat down on the floor and covered half of my face with my non-bloody hand "I'm... I'm so sorry"

"Why?" He said in an almost-whispers.

I just look up as my expression changes to regret. Niall walks over to me and picks me up and closes the toilet seat. Then he sits me down on it and starts tearing pieces of paper off of the toilet paper roll.

He doesn't say a word as he cleans up the blood. Once he is done, he presses some more paper against the cuts and looks me in the eyes.

"Why did you do this to yourself?" He asks.

"You wouldn't understand. You have a perfect life, Mr. Popular. Maybe you should ask your slut girlfriend, Tara if she knows why!" I yell and then storm out of my bathroom, out of my bedroom, down the stairs, and out of the door.

I slam it behind me and start running towards the one place I felt comfortable, the park. I start to notice some blood flowing from my uncut hand.

I open it and then realize that I had been gripping my razor tightly in my hand and it was cutting my palm open. The pain hits me like a bullet.

I yelp, and then start to feel faint.

Blackness takes over as I faint into a bush

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That was all I could write for today, it is Monday night and I am tired. I didn't have school today though because if Labor Day.

I know that cutting is a serious issue. If you cut or feel depressed or have any problems then feel free to inbox me on wattpad or message me on twitter. My accounts are @jjulianneee and @themultiangirl :) also my Instagram is @jjulianneee too.

Thankyou for the people who read, vote, and comment a lot, thankyou, ily.

I don't care how many people read, I am going to write no matter what because it is fun, not to gain fans. The fans are just an added bit of fun and encouragement. I want to give every single one of y'all a hug.

Ok, have a nice week!

-Julianne xoxo