Chapter Sixteen

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 The lights were off and I was lying under my covers in pure silence. It'd been like this for the past month. My mother and I hadn't spoke and I kept the fragments of Grey's letter that I had torn all to pieces in the palm of my hand that was closed into a fist. The tears never seemed to stop.

I couldn't believe he'd let this happen. How could he do this to me? How? He was never supposed to leave me. He had promised. Grey had made a lot of promises he couldn't keep. That's was what hurt. My bedroom door opened and I stayed motionless under the covers.

“It's time for your pain medication,” my dad announced, turning on the light. The yellow glow from the bedroom light showed through my pale pink sheets. I groaned, sniffed, wiped my tears, and then sat up. It took a while for my eyes to get adjusted to the lights.

Putting out an open palm he dropped the two pills into my hand and placed a glass of water on my nightstand. He then sat down on the bed and patted my leg softly. “Vi, you need to stop sitting around here depressed.” He didn't say it in a rude or assertive voice. He said it in fatherly way.

I sighed and took the pills before answering. “I miss him,” I mumbled, raking a hand through my bangs.

“I know you do. But I'm not happy about the sneaking around and I'm not happy about him being in this house without us knowing. I can't believe it went on for this long.”

I didn't want to talk about it. “I know, Dad.”

He understood. “I'm sorry that your mom is acting like she is,” he muttered after a while. “I've been trying to make her come around just a little bit but she's not buying it.”

The ends of my lips twitched and tried to form into a small smile but they just couldn't. “Thanks for trying...”

On an awkward, silent note he left. The door shut quietly behind him. I grabbed my phone and began scrolling through it as I checked for messages or voice mails or missed calls. Nothing. With shaking fingers I typed in his number that I'd known by heart.

It rang and my heart rate increased as I thought about him actually picking up. I wanted to hear Grey's voice. The closest I got was his answering machine. I sighed. Hey, you've reached Grey. I uh, I can't get to the phone, but if you leave a message I'll call you back. Thanks, bye. My chest ached as the beep echoed into my ear.

For about ten seconds I stayed on the line in complete silence. I debated whether to hang up or leave a simple message. “Um,” I whispered, staring off into space. “Grey I” the words came out in choppy, breathless sounds. “You promised that you wouldn't hurt me and here you are...And I...Please...I miss you, Grey. I know you don't mean it. I know-” the message beeped, signaling the end and I groaned as I threw it to the edge of my bed.

I could see Grey in my mind as he sat in his apartment all alone. His phone would ring and he'd reluctantly pick it up to see who it was. My name would flash across the screen and he'd set it down and convince himself not to answer it even though he wanted to. He'd get up as it'd continue ringing and walk around with his hands locked behind his head. Then Grey would go to his fridge and get a beer, pop it open and take a long swig before his phone dinged with a message. He'd delete it without listening to it and that would be the end.

It wasn't fair. We were supposed to work through everything even if we fought during it and even if we didn't talk for a couple of days. It was all supposed to work out in the end. I was going to turn eighteen and I was going to tell my parents everything and then I was going to pack up and move in with him. I'd go to college and he'd work and then we'd always go to his mom's for dinner. It wasn't supposed to end up like this.

I sat up in my bed. My ankle ached and I winced, thankful that in a couple weeks my cast would be off. All I wanted right now was a long shower. It took me a few minutes to get into the bathroom on my crutches but I did it without the help of either of my parents. I wrapped my ankle so the cast wouldn't get wet and started the water.

Warm water ran over me as I sat my head against the cool tile of the shower and sighed. I wanted him to call me back. I wanted to hear his actual voice and have him standing in front of me with his beautiful aqua eyes and his messy hair. I wanted stupid little fights with him but have him kiss me and apologize and we'd laugh and then it'd all be okay.

All I'd ever wanted all of my life was for everything to be okay. “Okay, okay, okay,” I whispered, trying not to cry. “Everything's okay. Everything is okay.” The more you convince yourself the less true it seems. I began crying again. The tears mixed with the falling water. I was so sick of crying. I was so sick of this heartache.

It'd been over a month since a window visit and I began to forget the sound of his knocks against the glass in the late nights. I clutched my chest. I didn't want to forget. I didn't want to remember either. I was stuck in an endless battle. Wanting and needing. Hating and loving. Peace and War.

There was a knock on the door. I turned to the general direction of it, keeping my eyes closed. “Violet? Your father and I are running to the Farmer's Market. Do you want us to help you out before we leave?”

Sighing, I pressed my face even harder into the tile. “No, I'm fine.” I said it so quietly over the roar of the shower I wondered if she'd even heard me. She must have because besides the running water, it was all silent.

I eventually got out of the shower once the water turned ice cold and created deep goosebumps on my body. The amount of time I spent in there was unknown, but I kept cranking and cranking the temperature up until the hot water gave out. Of course I delayed getting dressed and I unfortunately checked my phone three or four times just to make sure he didn't have second thoughts.

He didn't.

Of course he didn't. He was Michael Grey. And finally, for once, everything was under his control. And I hated him for it.

A/N: Go follow my best friend Addieandthesloth. She'll be uploading stories soon hopefully :) 

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