Breaking Hope: Sirius Black's daughter Book 4

Losing Hope

  "Somehow, we'll find it. The balance between whom we wish to be and whom we need to be. But for now, we simply have to be satisfied with who we are." 

-Brandon Sanderson (The Hero of Ages)

***

  Being back at school was frustrating because I threw myself back into all my work...which was actually a lot. My lessons with Snape were starting to go well and Rhine and I were making progress in my shallow soul magic legilimency. 

I was also working really hard on my Alchemy project which was more difficult than I had anticipated. I should have seen this coming...making an elixir to cure all dark curse induced injuries would not happen in a week or even a year. So far all the potions I had managed to make were terrible. I had accidentally, I think, created a strange potion from Wolfsbane during my exploits. However for my main project, if I was ever to save Dumbledore's life, I needed a short cut.

Since there were Apparition tests happening in Hogsmeade, there were only four of us in Potions that afternoon: Harry, Ernie, Draco and I.

"All too young to Apparate just yet?" said Slughorn genially, "Not turned seventeen yet?" We shook our heads.

"Ah well," said Slughorn cheerily, "as we're so few, we'll do something for fun. I want you all to brew me up something amusing!"

"That sounds good, sir," said Ernie sycophantically, rubbing his hands together. Draco, on the other hand, did not crack a smile. 

"What do you mean, 'something amusing'?" he said irritably. 

"Oh, surprise me," said Slughorn airily.

Draco opened his copy of Advanced Potion-Making with a sulky expression. It could not have been plainer that he thought this lesson was a waste of time. Undoubtedly, he was begrudging the time he could otherwise be spending in the Room of Requirement.

"Draco, relax okay, we'll have time to work on the Cabinet." I said touching his shoulder.

"We are running out of time! We were supposed to do this by April...guess what, we are in April and there is nothing, nno progress." He said taking out ingredients for his hiccuping potion. I sighed, deciding to use this time to practise my healing potions. I chose a potion that could be used to heal werewolf-inflicted wounds that I had created as a derivative of wolfsbane. It was still a work in progress, but if I did manage to perfect it (which would obviously take months, even years), it could be the answer to savages like Fenrir Greyback. It could be used as a vaccine, someday, for all children, so that if they ever were to get bitten by a werewolf, they would never turn. It would be a breakthrough. As I worked, I looked sideways at my cousin.
Draco, looked thinner, he looked paler; his skin still had that grayish tinge, probably because he so rarely saw daylight these days. But there was no air of smugness, excitement, or superiority; none of the swagger that he had had on the Hogwarts Express, when he had boasted openly of the mission he had been given by Voldemort. 

Saddened by this, I worked silently next to him on my half-finished formula.

"Well, now, this looks absolutely wonderful," said Slughorn an hour and a half later, clapping his hands together as he stared down into the sunshine yellow contents of Harry's cauldron. "Euphoria, I take it? And what's that I smell? Mmmm . . . you've added just a sprig of peppermint, haven't you? Unorthodox, but what a stroke of inspiration, Harry, of course, that would tend to counterbalance the occasional side effects of excessive singing and nose-tweaking. ... I really don't know where you get these brain waves, my boy . . . unless —it's just your mother's genes coming out in you!"