Honesty ♧ Bucky Barnes

Honesty (part one)

Bucky's POV

The Soldier was sat on the couch again, watching intently as Erin diluted six drops of the serum into a litre of distilled water. She was completely focused, and he had the feeling that if he said something to her, she wouldn't even notice. It was the same as in the lab when she had been synthesising MFCTS and had been so engrossed in her work that she had completely forgotten about the time. 

It was amazing to the Soldier how somebody could just switch off from the outside world like that. That wasn't how he was programmed. He was always on edge, always on the look-out for danger, his senses heightened. It was exhausting. 

The cat was nudging his left ankle, and he smiled to himself, bending down to scratch behind its ears. 

"She hates everyone, you know."

Erin's voice made him look up. She was smiling, a beaker of clear solution in her hand. 

"What?"

She gestured to the cat, which had now jumped up onto the couch and was leaning its orange head against the Soldier's thigh, purring contentedly. 

"Crookshanks. She tried to bite my ex-boyfriend's hand off the first time he stroked her. She pissed on my mum once as well," Erin chuckled slightly at the memory, "Why the hell is she so pally with you? It makes no sense."

The Soldier allowed his metal hand to massage the thick fur behind the cat's head and shrugged his shoulders. 

"I've no idea."

She raised an eyebrow and turned back around, searching through her drawers for something. The Soldier could swear that he heard her mutter, "The cat whisperer," to herself as she looked. 

Eventually, she found what she was searching for, and pulled out a small surgical syringe, still in its sterile packaging. The Soldier stiffened immediately, losing any feeling of relaxation that he had had. Erin seemed impervious to his discomfort, but he couldn't help his heart rate increasing as he watched her unwrap the needle and dip it into the beaker, drawing up the fluid. It had been a long time since someone had injected him with a needle, there was a fuzzy memory in the back of his brain. A table he was strapped to, and a small doctor with wire-rimmed spectacles. His hair had been shorter then. He quirked an eyebrow. What a weird thing to stay in his memory, the length of his hair. 

"Orally or intravenously?" Erin asked him, flicking the side of the needle and watching the pale fluid come out of the top. The Soldier's answer was instant. 

"Orally."

Erin raised an eyebrow at the immediate response, and the Soldier scratched his neck uncomfortably under her gaze. 

"I don't like needles." That was the only explanation that he gave. For some reason, he was embarrassed by the fact, almost as if it was a weakness. He felt his body visibly relax when Erin nodded and threw the syringe into the trash can, and instead pulled a large glass from the overhead cupboard. She began to fill it with water. 

"Have you got anything stronger?" There was a hint of a joke to the Soldier's voice, but he couldn't keep the shake out of it. This was really happening, he was finally going to remember after so many years of anonymity. He was just worried that he may uncover some things he would rather forget. 

Erin gave him a smile, her straight white teeth gleaming from her pale face. Somehow, for a reason the Soldier didn't quite understand, it calmed him down a little bit. 

"You've come to the right biochemist." She admitted, "I am my flat block's resident alcoholic cat-lady."

She poured the water back into the sink and instead reached up to pull out a large bottle of whisky from the cupboard above her, unstoppering it and pouring a small amount into the glass. She then got a dropper and added exactly seven drops of MFCTS to the amber liquid.