TSZ Magazine: June 2016 (Issue #1)

The Ritual of Coming Out

by Ryan Keating (@-spiritually)

Photo taken at Milwaukee Pridefest, June 2016

Picture this: you've gathered your parents or your friends, who are all gathered in the living room, waiting to hear what you have to tell them. You're filled with anxiety. Will they accept you and say you love them? Will they reject you horribly and cast you out? This is the kind of pressure LGBT youth faces constantly. In fact, 42% of LGBT youth say they live in a community that doesn't accept LGBT people, both youth and adult, according to the Human Rights Campaign.

Whether you are gay, lesbian, asexual, trans*, or any other identity under the LGBT sun, there may have been a time that, even for a split second, you were scared of rejection. Especially with statistics showing that familial rejection of LGBT youth can lead to poor health and irrational decisions. According to the Family Acceptance Project, LGBT young adults who've reported rejection by their family are 8.4 times more likely to attempt suicide, 5.9 times more likely to report severe depression, and 3.4 times more likely to use and abuse illegal drugs. Scary statistics, right?

"Well, I figured out I was a lesbian on March 17th, 2015. I was scrolling through the LGBT tag on Tumblr and it hit me like a ton of bricks that I wasn't as straight as I always thought," says Ellen Wieland, a junior in high school (autospacey on Tumblr). "From there, it's just been an interesting journey figuring out who I am and how I want to live my life."

Many LGBT youth have also reported low self-esteem about themselves, not only for the way they look, but for their identity itself. "When I came out to my boyfriend as genderfluid, I was really scared. I was really confused and didn't know if maybe it was just a phase. He met me with approval and I felt accepted. I told a few other people, but I still felt self-conscious. You couldn't tell just by looking at me, after all," an anonymous high school student tells TSZ. "It went well for maybe, four months, before everything went haywire. My boyfriend left me, and being genderfluid was partially the reason why. My best friend would tell me how my identity was invalid. He'd keep drilling it into my mind. I hate myself for being the way I am. I just wish I could've just kept it all a secret."

Stories like this one are all too common, not just around the world, but here, at home, in Arrowhead. Despite being a loving community, LGBT youth still faces bullying and pressure from their peers and families. How can we, as a community, create a more loving, accepting community and bring those statistics down, even just a little bit?

[saffron]

"I never feel ashamed of who I am," says Wieland. "I think being straight would make my life easier, but never in a million years would I choose to be anyone but myself. I love who I am, and I love being a part of the amazing group of people that make up the LGBT+ community."

Note: Interviewers named and identified with permission. Statistics are from trusted sites.