How To Be Happy

Choosing Your Peers

Dear journal,

To be honest with you, I’m not quite sure what I was expecting. Perhaps depressed kids, like me. After all, those kids all have parents who have either abandoned them or who are dead or parents who are in jail, like mine. One way or another, their parents aren’t with them.

So when I entered the building that day I was surprised to be greeted by crazy screaming kids.

“Heeeeeey! Are you the new girl, Caroline? Den told me about you, I’ll show you to your room!”

I smiled at the loud cheery girl who was talking to me “Thanks, call me Carrie”

The girl grinned back “You're welcome! I’m Kelsie by the way! You can call me Kelly”

This made a part of me sadder, to see them happy but me not happy.

This also lifted the spirits of the other part of me, it reminded me not all hope is lost.

I didn’t know that day that Kelsie would become one of my closest friends like she is now, even though she’s a few years younger than me she is so easy to get along with and incredibly nice, unlike some of my old school ‘friends’.

School. Of course I had to go back to school.

School. What a dreadful word, especially after so much had happened.

The foster home was a while away from where I used to live, which meant it was a while from where my previous school was. I asked Den -who is also incredibly nice- if I could still go to my old school who said yes if I could go by the bus on my own.

It took great strength to get convince myself that everything will be alright and to go to school, forget everything and get on with life.

It’s funny, it really is, how blind a person can be.

When I went back to school, the word had somehow managed to get around that my mum was in jail and I was raped.

All the whispering was unsettling and agitating. Then I spotted my friends, who I thought were still friends at the time.

“Hey” I said wearily

I stood out of the crowd that day, I stopped pulling up skirt just before my ass, stopped wearing as much make up and wore my shirt properly, where you couldn’t see any cleavage just anything that would attract a lot of attention. Everyone other girl in the group was still dressed like that however.

“Ew don’t talk to me you slut”

Everyone had a perfect view of my mouth as my jaw hit the floor. “Excuse me?” If anyone was a slut then it would be Jessica, the girl that had just told me not to talk to her. She was the girl that had went through all the good looking and decent boys in our year and had already had sex, a few years before it was even legal for her to. Strictly speaking, I had too but that was in a very different circumstance.

“You heard me, you filthy scum. Sleeping with a man twenty years older than you is disgusting.” She sneered the last word spitting at me in the process.

Shattered and broken. I thought these were my friends, I thought friends were supposed to help each other out in hard times. I gathered up so much strength to come here just to be broken again.

What a confusing world.

The fact that I was knocked down and stood up again just to be knocked down was the hardest blows.

I grabbed Jessica by the collar of her ‘fashionably altered’ school shirt “Bitch you have no idea what I went through and you dare call me a slut?” Then dropped her and punched her square in the nose.

There was blood. And there was shouting and there was people holding us back from each other andalso people who were cheering us on.

Looking back at the events of that day, maybe I shouldn’t have punched Jessica. I have never been a person of violence but well, anger took over me.

I found myself in the head teacher’s office in no time.

“Caroline, you understand what you did is very serious and you know the reason that you are getting suspended right?

“Yes Sir”

And that was how I got suspended from my old school. To be honest I wasn’t too disheartened, I was glad actually.

After the incident I asked Den if it was on to move to a more local school, nearer the care home if it wasn't too much hassle. I guess going to a local school saved bus fare and the trouble I was in now so it was no problem.

I never seen a member of Jessica’s gang since then and I hope to never see one them again in the rest of my life.

I learned something out of those two experiences- meeting Kelsie and getting suspended from my old school. That is, choose who you hang around wisely.

Be friends with people that bring the best in you, people that you trust and people that make you happy.

~~~~~

Vote and comment for me? :D Possibly...fan/follow? 

So I notice some people add a song at the side and I thought i'd join the fun XD and it's a great way to find new music! 

This song is absolutely beaut and to remind anyone who's going through a hard time, stay strong and hang on!

Artist vs Poet - Stay Strong

So wattpad is being bitchy and saying that the link isnt valid so just search it up :L

Tiffany x