My FRIEND. My BIAS. My HUSBAND? (CNBLUE-Jonghyun)

Chapter 31: The truth hurts

Sorry for the long update guys 💙💙💙

Let's start with a drama ^_^

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LARA's POV

I did not went to Korea that year eventhough unnie and umma wanted me to go. I just can't! I lied that I'm very busy with school and I think they understand 'cause they don't bother me anymore.

I even decline unnie Cacia's wedding invitation 'cause I might see Jonghyun there. I can't, I just can't. Maybe at the right time. After I graduate, maybe then we can talk our differences. If we can still work our relationship or not.

What will be the result after that, I promised to continue being their fan.

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More than a year have passed, still no call or text from Jonghyun. I understand, he maybe just very busy.

I watched all his dramas and listned to all their new songs. He even build a dessert shop, how cool is that. How I used to love desserts. I wish I can visit there soon. I'm so proud of his achievements. I can only support him from a far. It's really better this way. It is....

"Kirk! I told you stop it!" I'm really getting angry of Kirk right now. He wont listen to what I say. He really is so stubborn in courting me. I really have to tell him the truth for him to stop.

"Lara, why are you like that? I love you. Give me a chance. I'll make you the happiest girl on earth." He proclaimed.

"I told you I can't!" I slightly yell.

"Yeah? Because you're reserved for your Korean crush? You know his world Lara. I watched his reality shows and he looks like a playboy to me. How about that concert last year? Did he even glanced at you? No! Because you're just one of his fans." He argued. I know! You don't need to slap that on my face. My eyes started to water but I manage to control it.

"I know his world, I know the possibilities. I know I'm not like other girls who're surrounding him. I know that I'm just a fan. I know......I know...." I look down pitying myself. I perfectly know it Kirk and it hurts so bad.

"Why are you still into him when you knew the reality?" He softened his voice and tears started to fall.

"Because I love him..." I told him sobbing.

"You're just blinded by your love to Kpop Lara. You don't literally love that guy." He cupped my face.

"No Kirk you don't understand." I continue.

"I completely understand Lara. Just give me a chance to love you."

"No Kirk you really don't understand. I love him.. I love him.. I love him... and it really hurts" I said. Tears won't stop falling.

"How can you love a man who didn't even know you existed? It's not love, maybe you're just....." I cut him off...

"He knows my existence. He knows all about me. He knows me very well......" I started sobbing again. Kirk looks so confused looking at my sobbing face.

"You're getting insane over that guy Lara. Come on let's go. I'll get you some ice cream. Let's talk about this some other time." He stand and try to guide me out.

"No Kirk let's talk about this now. I'm not insane, I'm not confused, I'm not blinded by no one and especially I'm not crazy. Do you know why I can't accept your love? Do you know why I don't let anyone court me? Do you know why I did all those things just to see him? Do you know why I try so hard to be noticed again?......." He put his pointer finger in my lips and make a "sssshhhh" sound.

"Again?" He shook his head "It's okay Lara.... I understand" he smiled and assured everything is alright.

"No you don't. You never did. I love him... I love him and I still do and forever will, eventhough people accused him of this and that. I love him even though he's and idiot. I love all of him because he's my HUSBAND." He suddenly burst into a slight laugh of what I just said.

"Lara....." He shook his head again and hold my shoulder.

"He is and it hurts. We keep it a secret to everyone for a long time. Only our parents, his sibling and also his bandmates knows. Even Jaira, Mariz, Kaira and Coco doesn't know. Do you know why the sudden change of family name? I lied, I wasn't adopted by anyone. I was married to him before entering college. We don't have a choice then. We can't just shout it to everyone. We're still young and confused back then. I went to Korea not to be with the family that adopted me but I went to his family. It was okay before but now.... I don't know anymore..." I started to cry again. Kirk did not say a word and only comforts me. I know he's hurt 'cause I did not told him before. I'm sorry but I have to do that.

"He didn't noticed me during concert 'cause we argued a few months before that. He never bothered call or text me again. I know he's busy. It was all my fault, I wanted to say sorry but I'm scared to be rejected by him. I'm scared that he don't want me anymore. I'm just so scared......" Tears drop like crazy. Kirk smiled and hugged me. I sobbed in his chest.

"Ssshhhhh.. Sssshhhhh. I believe you. I'm sorry for pushing myself into you. Good thing you did not hit on me. He might sue you and charged you with adultery." I punch his back.

"Jerk!" He lightens my mood.

"I'm sorry for not telling you earlier....."

Kirk's POV

She really liked him for making such ridiculous story like this. I'll just go with the flow.

"I understand.. I'll keep your little secret. I hope we can still be friends" she started to hugged me tighter.

"Forever friends. Thank you for understanding Kirk." She said. She only see me as a friend.

"Ouch! FRIENDS." I giggled. "If he ever tries to hurt you, don't come to me crying..... Joke! If he tries to hurt you, I'll break his pretty face" I assured. I really break that guys face if he tries to hurt Lara. I don't care if I'll be thrown in prison.

Jonghyun's POV

It's been more than a year of my stubbornness. If I call her now, would she answer? Is she still mad at me? What if she's happy with Kirk now? What if.......

I'm such a Jerk. Lara won't ever forgive me.

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CAN'T STOP CONCERT PH

Another concert, another heart ache.

He colaborated with girl groups composing their music. I don't know why but I don't like him working with them. It makes me so....... Well, what can I do?

I did not went to Can't stop PH as much I wanted to go 'cause our exam was dated same day as the concert. I was very disappointed for not going 'cause it's the only way I could see Jonghyun again but I have to be strong, I need reach my dreams. Almost there Lara. Just a little more.