Mockingjay: Peeta's POV

Chapter Six

Chapter Six

Why does tracker jacker venom have to be so painful? It feels like my blood is on fire as it travels through my veins. Like straight fire was injected into my veins. It doesn't help that my dose has be increased, and since they increased my does my hallucinations have decreased, but now my memories come to surface in my brain.

With all the tributes watching, she stands on her tiptoes and kisses my cheek. Right on the bruise; it feels like fire runs through me. Burning me. Causing me pain and disgust.

That's not how it happened. I would say I know it, but I can't remember what exactly I thought.

"I've brought you a treat. I found a new patch of berries a little farther downstream."

I open my mouth and take a bite. Then, frown, "They're very sweet."

"Yes, they're sugar berries. My mother makes jam from them. Haven't you ever had them before?" she says giving me more.

I'm confused, "No. But they taste familiar. Sugar berries?"

"Well, you can't get them in the market much, they only grow wild," she gives me more.

"They're sweet as syrup," she gives me the last of it. "Syrup." I get it now. It's sleep syrup! She puts her hands over my mouth and nose, forcing me to swallow. But, it's too late I'm drifting off into a drug induced slumber. I'll never forgive her for this. She's trying to kill me off. Trying to give me enough sleep syrup to make me permanently sleep.

No. No. Katniss wouldn't try to kill me. She must have been drugging me for a good cause. That's it. It has to be. It just has to be.

I move closer to her. I kiss her. The first kiss we're both not injured or sick. My lips burn so much it almost hurts. Like a kiss of death.

It wouldn't hurt. I don't know what's going on with my brain right now. It's getting all muddled and foggy.

"Trust me," she whispers. I let her go. She puts a handful of berries in my hand. Then fills her own palm. "On the count of three?"

"The count of three. Hold them out I want everyone to see."

She squeezes my hand. "One. Two. Three!" I lift my hand to my mouth, and I know Katniss has done the same. Why am I doing this? Why kill yourself? I can go back to Twelve and be with my family. Don't go along with her plan.

It can't be. I must have took the berries for a better reason. I didn't just take them because she told me to.

"You were dead! Your heart stopped!" she cries, clasping her hand over her mouth.

"Well, it seems to be working now. It's all right, Katniss," I say. She nods her head but continues sobbing. "Katniss?" I question. Why is she crying? It's not like she actually loves me. It's all a trick for the camera.

Why does my brain keep doing this? She must have cared.

"Your family needs you, Katniss," I say. I pause before continuing. "No one really needs me."

"I do. I need you," Katniss argues.

I take a deep breath. Before I can say another word, Katniss lips meet mine. After a few attempts of trying to reason with Katniss, I give up on talking. How can I sit here just letting her kiss me? Why? It's better, I guess, to go along for now and wait for her to die later.

No. What? That's not what Katniss means to me. At least, I think that's not what she means to me.

My brain finally lets me start to wake up, letting me go from these tainted memories. I shoot up in bed, a coat of sweat on my forehead. What actually happened? The venom had messed up my memories! I can't remember what's what anymore.

Edited