Damaged ✧JACK GILINSKY

"One night stand & anxiety"

-Luna's POV-

» Somebody to you - The vamps ft Demi «

-

"Ah god" I groaned waking up in an unfamiliar bed, I had the worst headache ever, probably cause I was drinking like a maniac last night, God everything from last night is completely blurry.

"Well good morning to you too sweetheart" I hear an unfamiliar voice, the voice of an angel, and his thick accent kinda like Zayn's but different.

"Who are you?" I ask getting off the bed quickly which was certainly a bad idea because my head was spinning and I was gonna throw up any second now.

"I'm-" Before the unfamiliar man could finish his his sentence I ran to the bathroom and started throwing up, I was on my knees and and was throwing up inside the toilet, probably everything I've ate the last 6 months.

He came behind me pulling my hair into a makeshift ponytail as I was throwing up, I probably looked disgusting, but honestly I couldn't care less. I am disgusting.

I got up feeling woozy, now I remember why I don't drink that much anymore, well that and another reason, Jack would always ask for a glass and, well the night doesn't go well.

"You okay love?" Once again the unfamiliar man speaks to me, I nod my head completely lying, he gets me a glass of water and I'm guessing Advil, I quickly take hoping the headache would go away quickly.

"Mhm" I moaned as I finally looked at the man, he looked so familiar, I don't know where I know him from but he looks really familiar, jeez did we sleep together?!

I was wearing an oversized white shirt with no bra and only underwear, please, please tell me we didn't, God I'm disgusting. What is Jack gonna think? Why am I always thinking about him!

"Harry styles" He finally says his name as it clicks to my head, Harry, the Grammy winning actor/singer. Oh god, I always embarrass myself with high end people. Why am I alive?

"Um, Luna Elmi" I say walking to the bathroom as I wash my face and find a toothbrush and Colgate brushing my teeth as Harry is outside.

I walk out the bathroom slowly, hoping that it's all a dream, because I don't wanna face reality anytime soon. I had sex with him, Jack was coming back tomorrow, this wasn't how it was suppose to go.

"I um have to go" I say before grabbing my dress and heading to the bathroom, I quickly took off the white shirt folding it and sliding on my dress, I had a band on my hand tying my messy hair into a ponytail.

"Are you sure about that? There's paparazzi in the lobby and outside" Harry says from the other side of the door, I groan, I hate paparazzi, I'm not even famous! God I need to find regular friends.

"I'll take you out around the back way" He says, I nod my head as if he can see me, I shout out okay as get out the bathroom giving him his shirt since he's only in his jeans now.

I slid on my heels, why'd I decide to wear heels last night? Where's Ciara? How'd I end up with him? Why was I drinking so much? All the questions flooded to my head, I decided to figure it out later, but right now I have to go home.

As Harry put on his button up shirt making sure to leave two buttons undone, as always, we walked out the hotel room as we went down the elevator and got directions to the back door.

How was Jack suppose to react? Oh god I'm disgusting, I hate myself. Jacks completely right, nobody would love me, his words play in my mind like a broken record on repeat. Why am I alive?

When the bruises I receive after my "punishments" fade there's still always gonna be a many scars on my heart that can't ever heal, I just feel like my heart has been ripped out of my body, stomped on, cut open and stitched back together and given back only to restart the cycle.

What if I was a little thinner, maybe Jack would like me. Madison has the perfect body, smile, hair, eyes, and literally everything. If I was more like her maybe he would've loved me like he loved her. I don't like myself, I don't want to be myself.

"You okay?" Harry asks me as we walk out the back entrance seeing no trace of paparazzi thankfully, maybe Jack won't have to know what I've done.

"Harry, who's the lady" We hear someone by then paparazzi came flooding in taking snaps of me and Harry, it was to good to be true for a moment. I was trying to cover my face but it was hard because the paparazzi were invading my personal space and got me up close.

"Come on let's go" Harry whispers in my ear, what's up with me and guys that are famous? Why can't I ever find a regular normal boy, we can fall in love, have a couple of fights: that wouldn't end up with him abusing me, and apologize after, get married and have kids.

As a child I always used to think I'd get married by the time I'm 23 at the least, but now looking at myself, I'm letting myself down, why am I hopelessly in love with a man that doesn't acknowledge my presence?

We entered the car and drove off as the paparazzi was following but they finally gave up, he dropped me off at my apartment/penthouse and he insisted that he would walk me up to my apartment but I said no trying to forget about this whole day.

I got inside the building as the front lobby people were saying hello and good morning to me, I took the elevator up to my complex. I was ready to fall back asleep and forget about everything. I turned on my phone checking what's been going on, I searched up Harry styles.

All I saw was the pictures of me and Harry blowing up online, my face was mostly covered by Harry's arm but you can see my body and hands. The ring I received from Jack shining bright on the website, I wanted to break down and cry right here. Jacks gonna know it's me.

Speaking of the devil, my phone started ringing as I guessed it was Jack, I didn't want to answer it, I wasn't ready for all the stuff he would say to me, I'd probably break down crying as soon as I heard his voice, I declined his phone and turned my phone off.

I entered my apartment unlocking the door with my keys, I drop off my keys and bag and throw off my shoes going into my room, my home phone started going off, I was so sure of who it was if I didn't answer he would be angry and it wouldn't be a good tomorrow.

Let's just get this over with.

"Hello" I say answering the phone, my heart was pumping so loudly and fast, what would he say? He's gonna kill me, why can't I get myself to leave him?

"Don't hello me? What the hell are you doing with Harry styles? First Zayn and now Harry, you're fucking disgusting" He spits I can hear him gritting his teeth as he's speaking, I was ready for this but it's too early for all of this.

"Don't ignore me, you're a slut, I swear you're gonna get what you deserve when I get home. Don't play with me Luna" He says, he was about to say something else before I hung up on him.

I don't want to be alive.

-

This is long as fuck, no one reads this is kind of my favorite book currently I hate everything else lol.

QOTD: What grade are you going into when school starts? I'm going into freshman year :-(.