"Phil hurry the fuck up!" I heard Chris shout from outside my bedroom door. It hit a year today. A year since I lay down with my Danny and watched as his heart stopped.
"Coming!" I shouted hopping into the front room where Chris and Peej were sat cuddling on the couch. "Ok, so you tell me to hurry up then start cuddling? Honest to god guys, come on then," I complained pulling them both off the couch and shoved them out the front door and we ran down to Chris' car and I jumped in the passenger seat, Peej sat in the back.
"Music?" PJ asked making himself comfy in the back of the car.
"What do you want on?" Chris asked flicking between the Radio stations and finally stopping when a song we recognised came on.
"You make it easy,
Its easy as one, two, one, two, three, four"
"Chris, turn it off," I said staring out the window as we started to get close to our destination.
"Phil, just listen to it thi-" He started placing a hand on my knee. I jumped under his touch.
"NO! I said turn .. it .. off!" I slapped his hand away and hid my face in my hands. He was just about to turn it off but the song came to a finish and the Radio DJ started to talk.
"And that was for Phil Lester aka Amazingphil who's fiancé died a year today, my thoughts are with you Phil!" Chris sent me a cheeky smile, as did PJ.
"Oh my god man, guys!" I said punching Chris' arm lightly and he stopped the car outside the place we needed to be. "Well this is it," I said opening the car door and grabbing the flowers.
"Should we come or?..." Chris asked and I shook my head indicating I wanted to be alone.
*
"Hey Dan," I whispered sitting down beside him, placing the flowers down. I took a deep breath and pulled a notebook out my back pocket. It was full of picture, memories and loads of other things of me and Dan. "In the back, there's a couple of diary entry's, from when I missed you, well I always missed you but you know what I mean," I mumbled placing the little notebook next to the flowers sighing a bit. "A year, its been a year, I went crazy for 2 months you know, speaking to myself, imagining things, I wish I wasn't just imagining things," The drizzle of rain started to get heavier and my hair started to soak right through but I didn't care, nothing could spoil my mood right now. I got up onto my knees and lightly placed a kiss on the cold stone-head. I ran my finger over the engraving, I knew what it said off by heart now. 'Dan Howell. A beloved fiancé, son and best-friend. June 11 1991-2013'. The gravestone was right, he was beloved, by everyone. His fans. Chris and Peej. His family and most of all me. I loved him with all my heart, it was a shame for him to leave. I stood up on my feet and let the tears hit the ground. "See you soon precious," I whispered and blew a kiss before I slowly backed off to where my two best friends were stood. I wiped away the tears from my cheek, like it mattered.
"You okay?" Chris asked placing his hand on my shoulder, I just lightly shook my head.
"No, I'll never be okay again,"
A/N SORRY IT WAS SHORT AGAIN XD
BUT THIS IS JUST A THANKS FOR 15000 READS LIKE WOW, THANK YOU GUYS, ILOVEYOU!
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