WAVES [ dean x cas ]

The First and The Last

The first time they saw each other, they were little.

Middle school was scary. Castiel was kind of a nerd, and Dean didn't really fit in anywhere. It was a very cliche thing, but they both looked at each other with an unspeakable type admiration without each other knowing.

(Their classmates noticed).

They first time they spoke to each other, they were curious.

"Hey," Dean had said one time during a math workshop, "You're that kid with the freaky eyes, right?"

Castiel had looked up from his notebook and saw the freckles and green he loved and smiled.

"Yes," he answered, "I'm Castiel."

(Little did he know, Dean loved Castiel's messy hair and blue).

The first time they kissed, they fought.

They were just joking around under the bleachers at a track meet and somehow Castiel ended up shoving his lips onto Dean's. Of course, neither of them really understood how to kiss a boy, so it was more of a peck. Dean had, understandably, wiped his mouth off with his sweater sleeve and ignored Castiel for a week following.

(Dean had given up on shunning his best friend and texted him at 2 AM about the newest episode of American Idol).

•••

The last time they kissed, Dean was ill.

"Cas," he said with a huff, "Stop kissing me. You're gonna get sick one of these days, too."

Castiel just smiled and pressed his lips against Dean's hairline. "What," he joked, "Now I'm not allowed to kiss my husband?" 

(Castiel was easily able to hide the cough and runny nose he had obtained from Dean).

The last time they spoke, Dean was tired.

He was so tired, he had told Castiel.

"That's okay," Castiel told Dean. He ran his fingers over Dean's cheek, over the wrinkles that had gathered there in the last few decades. "I'm tired, too, Dean."

"You know?" Dean asked. "Can you believe how far we've come?" Castiel smiled, a watery smile, and shook his head.

"I can't." Castiel sniffed and told himself that it was just the fact that he was sad, not the fact that he was sick, too.

"To think that I once didn't even wanna talk to you." Dean paused and glanced at his IV bag, then at his husband, his most prized possession. "We made it, Cas. We have kids, we had a dog, we owned a house, Hell, we even have grandkids."

Castiel just nodded and wiped his eyes.

"We did good, Dean."

"God, I'm so in love with you," Dean said, and Castiel replied, "You'll never truly understand how much I love you, Dean."

(That night, when the nurse came in to check on Dean, she gave Castiel a sad look and a confirming nod).

The last time they saw each other, Dean died.

He died early in the morning. The birds were chirping, and the both of them were barely awake. Before Castiel knew it, Dean was clutching for his hand, pulling Castiel up against his chest, hugging him tightly, monitors going wild, and then, as Castiel opened his mouth to talk, his husband went limp under his body.

(Castiel died not too long after).

•••

Authors note: Y'all... I don't think you understand how hard I cried while writing this. It's seriously the first time I've written angst that doesn't have a resolution and, let me tell you, it isn't fun, but I felt that this collection of stories was getting too happy and smutty. (Don't worry, however, there is smut coming very soon, maybe even later tonight!)