The Darkness Behind The Light

Fathers Day

I wake up Sunday morning at 8 o'clock.
I get out of bed, quickly showering then drying my hair.
When it's completely dry, I look down at my flat iron and my curling wand, deciding which to use.
I decide on the curling wand because I love my hair curley.
When Im done I do my ushual makeup routine.
I run back into my room when I'm done, slipping on a navy blue dress along with my white wedges.
I quickly glance down at my phone 9:51
Good I'm not late today.
Today was a special day so the last thing I need to be is late.
I run into my mom's room to see if she was ready to drive Jeremy and I amd gladly she was.
We all get into the car driving to the church and when we arrive Jeremy and I climb out, heading into the church.
I was excited to two reasons today,
One, Nicole and Sarah are getting baptized today.
Two, Alex told me he was gonna be at church this morning.
Mostly the first one though.
Him coming to church is exciting because I wasn't sure if he was gonna start coming or not.
I quickly walk in, pretty much speed walking but when I walk into the colorful youth room I fail to see the pair of brown eyes I love so much.
He's probably just not here yet, a though passes through my head
Or he lied and he's not coming, another passes through.
Something probably just came up.
I decide to walk over and sit next to Nicole even though I've felt things have been kind of, different since the whole thing with Alex.
But it's not something that worries me, everything heals with time.
Through the lesson I'm continuously drifting off, having thoughts if him which I hate because I need to be paying attention in church.
I glance down at my phone,
10:38
He's not coming.
Before I know it it's time to go downstairs to preaching and I only got small parts if the lesson which I feel a little guilty for.
When were all downstairs we start with an opening song, then listen to the message, then it's time for the baptism's.
Sarah and Nicole quickly grab their things heading into the back rooms to change.
Once they are we start, Nicole goes first, then Sarah and I video the whole thing, or most of it.
When they're done I quickly run out to see them congradulating them before I have to leave.
As I'm walking out, I glance over the Alex's house. He's practically neighbors with the church.
He lives right across the street.
Why didn't he come?
I climb into my mom's car, Jeremy following behind me but the only thing I can keep my eyes on untill we pass was his house.
Even though he wasn't outside, I had hope he would walk out before we passed, but he didn't.
We kept driving heading to my grandparents house for Father's day lunch like we usually do for Father's day.
Its about a 35 minute drive and on the way there I decide to Snapchat Alex.
I feel like through the whole dinner I'm sitting there, staring at his Snapchat name, alexrenolds💯💯
Waiting for him to open it, waiting for him to respond to him.
Of course my cousin Courtney sees me staring at my phone impatiently, looking over my shoulder at the people I've recently Snapchated.
"Ooh! Who's Alex!?! Who's Turner!?!
I laugh at her words quickly answering
"Turner's just a friend if mine, since the 5th grade. Alex I can't say the same for. I hope he's going to be more but it's been complicated"
"How is it complicated?" She asks
"My friend also likes him and I told her I'd back down then alot happened and now's she's backing down and I feel guilty" I say back
"Dang, how if your life so complicated you're like...13!"
"I'm 14 and yes it is complicated" I say as I manage to laugh but the thought of him missing church is still on my mind.
Apparently Courtney can see it to
"Don't worry, it'll all work out. It already does" she says before getting up to greet our cousin Elizabeth who had just walked in.
I realize now that I've been talking to her for the 30 minutes or so and I haven't even looked at my phone once.
I quickly click the button on the side cutting it on seeing the alert.
Snapchat from alexrenolds💯💯
I quickly put in my password unlocking my phone and pull up my Snapchat opening the snap from him.
It reads the simple word "hey" and I snap him back.
We had a simple conversation but it was amazing.
The way he talked to me was perfect.
Pretty much just 24/7 flirting and I was blushing in every picture I sent but it was still perfect.
We talked and he said the reason wasn't at church was he was helping a friend of him fix his truck.
We continued talking and my aunt asked who I was talking to and of course Courtney being who she is had to go and shout "she talking to her booyfrriend!!"
I quickly give her a hatefully playful glance after assuring my whole family that he's not my boyfriend.
Then of course my mom has to go and add that we only talk extremely offten and that I really like him.
I also give her a hateful glance.
Thanks mom for ruining the situation I just fixed.
We finish eating then after mom helps clean up we head home.
I go to my room laying down and thinking back over Alex and i's conversation.
Amazing.
I felt different talking to him.
I felt myself.
Like I've finnaly found myself.
We don't have church tonight so basically I have the rest if the day to be bored.
Alex and I end up having another conversation around 10 and it's just as amazing as before.
He asked if i wanted to hang out tomorrow night and I was litteraly dying.
Sadly I had to say no because my best friend Winter who lives in North Carolina is coming down to spend the night with me for a week.
I haven't seen her in a year so I can't wait but I really wish I could have said yes.
I tell him that Winter and I usually walk down to the store and we might can meet up then, since he does live basically across the street.
He agrees and I tell him I'll see him then.

Author's note:
omg y'all!!! I love this chapter so much but I also hate it for reasons😂. Anyways hope you like this chapter and sorry if there's alot of typos! I was typing fast! But hope y'all like it!!