Just a Game

It Worked

Jace // chapter thirty-eight

My head hurt and the sun weighed heavily on my eyes as I walked to the Children's Hospital entrance. I let go last night, drowning myself and all that dared to trouble me in a bottle of bourbon. It was foolish, completely childish. I should've handled my life with more patience. I should've handled the hands I was dealt with maturity. Instead, I got drunk and did God only knows what.

I got a dark cup of coffee before entering the ER, which was where I was supposed to be; at least, that's where I think I'm supposed to be.

Until that very moment, she hadn't crossed my mind at all today. It was so odd for me not to think of her, not to want her, not to need her. I guess for today the headache took that seat, driving me near the edge of the cliff I'd been battling. But two seconds in the ER and my eyes landed on her at the far back, laughing with a kid who seemed to have stapled his hand through. He was giggling along with her, his painful injury long forgotten.

So much has changed in the past few months; I didn't even know where she was going to college. I'd known her options long ago, but I'm sure if I were to ask her now, she would shut the door in my face. She'd cut her hair short, about an inch or so below her shoulder and she'd lightened it to a beautiful golden brown that brightened up her face. Happiness had begun to reclaim its place in her features and it was a bittersweet moment for me witness. She stood a bit taller, her confidence retracing its steps back to where it had stood before I had crashed mine into it.

Her eyes looked up to me when I approached the desk she'd walked to after finishing off with the boy. They lightened up for the shortest second, before glooming back to the darkness I hated. "Jace."

I nodded stiffly, my throat thick with words that I couldn't say. "Hey."

"They, uh, they want us to talk to the kids about something in that room," she said monotonously, pointing to a room behind me, which I didn't care to turn to look at.

I stood still listening to her speak. This was the first time in months that we've addressed each other directly since our fallout and there was something about it that warmed my cold heart. She looked so beautiful standing there, her arms crossed and her lips in distraught as they formed a tight line. There were no words to describe how much I missed her, none that I could think of and surely, none that I could say out loud.  I missed her delicate touches, the soft massages she would give me when I seemed stressed. I missed her kisses, the ones of a passion so strong, it surprised me that I'd found her at such a young age. People go on for years, wondering and looking for that someone who was theirs-their person. I'd found her at the age of seventeen. 

But I lost her at eighteen. 

There wasn't anything I wouldn't do to her back into my arms again. I wanted her to be mine and I hers. That, however, was the impossible that couldn't be altered. My hands were tied. I had to watch from a distance as the one thing that mattered more to me than my family was shattered and ripped away from my reach. 

Her unclear eyes continued to observe me as I imagined having her in my arms once more. Nonetheless, I had to bring myself back to reality. So I gave her a small smile and nodded. "What are we talking to them about?"

She shrugged, walking by my side as we approached the room in fast strides. "I think the lady said sex. They want to make sure they know not to do it at such a young age."

I couldn't help but snicker. "You're joking. Sex, really?"

She smiled and I almost kissed her right then and there. "Yes, J. Sex."

J. She called me J. 

She called me J. 

Jesus, I nearly had a heart attack. But before I could really do much, her smile disappeared and she took a step back from where we had stopped in front of the closed door of the room. "I have to really use the restroom. I'll be right back, okay?"

Instantly, I knew she was lying from the way her eyes wouldn't look at me as she said the words, but I wasn't going to push her. So, I took a step back and nodded once. And as quickly as our lighthearted spirit had come, it vanished into thin air and she walked away. 

My eyes closed in wait of the pain that would soon engulf every part of me. I dreaded it, hated the memories it would resurface, the vile words that were said, but also the beautiful ones that held all that was the love I once had. 

Moments later, someone cleared their throat, stealing my attention away from the pictures that almost brought me down to my knees. I blinked sharply and turned to the source of the noise. A young boy stood there, smiling at me, with a large bouquet of roses in his hands. 

"Um, I'm supposed to deliver these to Alice Moore. They said she would be in this room," he said, his voice cracking a bit here and there, as he pointed to the door behind me.

My eyebrows furrowed slightly in curiosity. "She went to the restroom to freshen up, but I can give it to her when she gets back."

His smile widened and he nodded quickly. "Okay," he said, handing me the flowers that sparked a defiance in me that I didn't want to pursue, "thank you so much."

I nodded as an answer as he walked away, not wanting to prolong the conversation more than I needed to.

The flowers were beautiful, no doubt there. They were a deep red with the thrones uncut but covered by the thick plastic that wrapped around the stems. It held a beauty that I could understand but held a bittersweet attention that I couldn't ignore. A small piece of paper was carelessly implemented between two flowers in the middle. I couldn't help my fingers as they reached to grab it. It was folded in half, the address to Alice written carefully and clearly on the front. Bewitched, I unfolded it.

Hey Ali,

I wanted to thank you for all that you shared with me last night. I'd missed every part of you while you were gone-you laugh, your smile, your voice, and most importantly, your touch. If at anytime you need to be in my arms again, please remember I'm just a phone call away. 

yours always,

Damon

I swallowed hard as my eyes reached the last word. She slept with Damon? 

Oh my, God, it worked. 

Their plan worked and she fell for it. 

How could she have fallen for it? 

With that last thought, the first tear I bore since the night of our breakup fell. 

I've truly lost her. 

***

A/N: Happy late Friday! I hope you enjoy this chapter and please don't forget to leave a star or comment below. This rollercoaster is getting wilder by the minute and I hope you're enjoying it! Thank you for everything. I'll see you guys next week.