Who Are You

Crazy in love. Literally

A/N:

Okay guys I've been working really hard to think of new chapter ideas and I finally got some so get ready!

I wake up cuddled into something warm.It doesn't take me long to realize that J is holding me close. 'I love him so much,' I think. 'Wait...love? Do I love him. I guess I do. I have for a while I just couldn't admit it to myself but I guess it's out now.' I feel J sit up, "what was that doll," he asks yawning. 'Crap Ash. You were talking to yourself not thinking. Good job,' I think and I roll m eyes at myself and scowl. "You know, it's cute when you do that," J says smirking. "Doing what," I ask confused. "I can tell when you're talking to yourself in your head. Whenever you do something you think is dumb you roll your eyes and pout. It's adorable." He says all this as he stands up and stretches. He smiles when he sees my shocked expression. "I didn't think you paid that much attention to me," I mumble embarrassed. "Of course I do doll," he says as he comes to sit on the bed, "you mean more to me than you think." Before I can say or even think anything I'm pulled into a gigantic hug. "Mistah J, I have something I gotta tell you..." I trail off. What if he doesn't feel the same. I try to shake that thought away as I gather courage to say this. "I think that...well..that I'm in love with you." I burst out. It came out fast and a lot louder than I meant it to. I look down quickly and scoot away from him. 

"I don't know what to say," J says hesitantly. 'He doesn't feel the same...I knew it.' I think. The voices kick in. 'Of course he doesn't who would love you.' 'Sure. You're new appearance is beautiful but you're still the same disgusting Ashlynn you used to be.' The voices are harsher than usual and there are more of them. More and more come until everything else is drowned out and all I hear are the voices screaming in my head. I don't know when but I got up and ran. I dont know where but all of a sudden I see light and I feel fresh air. I keep running and running. It feels like hours and the voices won't stop. I don't know when but at some point I collapsed in a fit of tears. 'J doesn't want you.' 'no one wants you.'  The voices scream in my head. "Disgusting. Freak. Unlovable. Ashlynn. Insane. Just go die." The voices suddenly stop and I realize that I had been the one to say the last things. "Maybe I should just die. No one would care. Everyone but J and his goons already think I'm dead." I try to get up but fall immediately screaming in pain. My head felt like it was splitting open. While I'm screaming and crying I hear someone yelling and footsteps coming my way. It was three people running toward me. I could feel them. NO hear. I could fe-hear them. 

I feel someone pick me up and start walking and that's when I black out.

*DREAM TYPE THINGY*

The car was really fancy with white leather seats. J is sitting next to me laughing crazily. Next thing I know I'm screaming and we're in the air I hear a crash and see a dark figure as I pass out. My mind starts swimming with the colors. Purple and green. Then red. Black, Blue, pink, orange, more green. Leaves and pointy ears fill my head. 'Why is Midnight on top of a floating jester hat,' I start to think before I hear a chorus of voices, "Welcome to you mind. We've been waiting."