My room in eyes of a bystander [iwaoi]

volume seven

,,don't let me be gone."  [goner, twenty one pilots ; isolation, self-realisation, phobias, depression]

khai was nothing other than the definition of silence pressed up in one person, not counting the slurps of coffee that made a loud sound as he watched what was around him.

    first things he could see were two boys, or rather said men. both looked like in need of sleep, with purple shades carved under their eyes. but even when so tired whenever they passed eachothers viewpoints their eyes shone with a glint of passion. and khai loved it. it looked so everlasting.
he started at them so intensely, his fingertips eager to paint, as he shakily reached out for his mug. no, he put his hand back down on the table and slammed his forehead down on the edge of the table. he could hear his big brother sigh.

,,khai sweetie are you okay?" the brunet that was all by now quiet asked. oikawa was always worried for everyone.

  he was worried if khai was okay. but what also worried him was khai not talking, iwaizumis past and iwaizumis emotions. his heart swelled up from all the worries and it reached his throat, choking him. what was choking him?  was he just choking himself on the insides? he knew he was.
khai just held up a thumbs up, his forhead and fringe still pressed hard against the wooden table. but oikawa could feel the pressure that tightened the air around him. it made him panic. it was as if the walls made of self-control and worry shaked and collapsed over him. and iwaizumi was right there to see him, to see it happen.
iwaizumi liked having everything in control. everything according to a plan and order. and this day had none of those. oikawa had his eyes fogged out, without the glint in them. what did that mean?
   oikawas eyes with nothing joyful in them reminded hajime of the first day when he saw the brunet get dragged away into the room. he didn't want oikawa to ever feel like that again. ,,oikawa?" he asked as he slided to the others side of the booth. oikawa didn't respond, but rather stared at khai as the latter scratched the table with his fingernails.

,,oikawa?" hajime repeated louder. ,,tooru!"  he half yelled, yanking the boy towards him. though the boy had his face hidden in iwaizumis chest he said nothing, nor he reacted. he blindly stared at iwaizumis shirt. khai looked up, as if in horror, his lower lip hanging open in shock.

hajime let his left hand wander up and down the fabric of the shirt that covered oikawas back in a comforting matter. his other hand had fingers tangled in lightly curled out strands of hair, as it pressed oikawas head to his chest. all that was the brunet doing was breathing. he was breathing in the sharp scent that tickled, the one his nose was finally used to. it was the scent of spilled ink, warmth and hot gerbal tea. the scent of loving, caring and a dash of control. it was hajime.

iwaizumi worried about oikawa. besides his little brother who sat there across the two, oikawa was the first person he ever cared about. so he lowered his head, resting his chin in the light hazel curls that tickled just under his nose. and he breathed in deeply. it was the scent that made him do so much more than ever, the one that inspired him and made him bleed ink from the tops of his fingertips. it was a light scent that needed a deep breath to be understood. a scent of cold coffee, sweat and stardust. it had all the loving and care, with light dashes of covered up pain in it. and hajime really loved the scent. it was the essence of oikawa tooru.

,,hey, tooru? how about a poem, huh?" the raven asked, as he felt his heart tighten along with the other boys fists. he nodded.

,,it was fine, by iwaizumi hajime.

it was fine,
my whole life in a nutshell.
it was windy days
and hot tea type of time.

i'm sure,
that it was fine.
untill i saw your cold eyes,
with a glass of vine.

it was all but fine,
it was dashing pain.
but your cries at night,
create a perfect rhyme.

it was more than fine,
it was all roses and sweet words like stars allinged.
i never knew such a joy in life,
but you'd make a lovely valentine."

[761 word]

with most honest apologises for being oh so late, i broke a foot.

oops? also new iwaoi fic soon "something real"  and a reigisa fic for you free! trash "underneath"

love you

ryan
GrandKingOikawa i choose you