Love, Nina

Entry 8

ENTRY 8

It's Saturday and I am supposed to be not alone. I should be hanging out with one of my study groupmates or my so-called fake friends for some fake conversation and fake fun. I love fake fun because losers are envious of our fake friendship and I want them to feel more alone than ever. But why would I love to make them see that I'm happy? So they can pull all their shit together and be better. They should exert effort to keep themselves from being alone.

I stared at the icy window of our dorm room. Everything is white outside and soon, I'll have to come home on Christmas break and spend it there. It's actually more of a nightmare for me. Cold weather sucks since I have to wear shapeless garments and cheap knitted sweaters. I can't afford a good coat that's why I hate winter. My classmate Jackie from Geography class was wearing a Burberry coat yesterday and I was dying of envy. Sadly, all I can afford is a cheap ass winter garments from Forever 21. 

*ding*

JosephJ: Hi

NinaRain: Hello there

JosephJ: I'm at Checo's right now, wanna hang out? Says here you're just around the corner

NinaRain: Of course I wanna fuck

JosephJ: WHOA there tigress. I wanna eat some ribs here at Checo's, so wanna come? We can talk about fucking afterwards. If you want? Lunch is my treat. :)

NinaRain: Sure. I'm just here inside the Uni.

JosephJ: A student? Okay, waiting. ;)

I grabbed my boots, wore my oversized cashmere grey sweater and black scarf. I just walked since I presume he's got a car himself, and also it's a waste of gas. I'm going broke from all the expenses I had to pay for this past month. 

I actually saw him quickly, he's a tall brunette guy with large blue eyes and white pale skin. He has toned biceps. I sat in front of him and he smiled.

"Wow, are you my twin?" He said, referring to my brunette hair and blue eyes. I got the same pale skin.

"Could be. Incest is so fucking hot. Anyways, what are we having?"

"Some ribs, coleslaw and corn bread. I already ordered so no need to take out some cash." He told me. Well at least he had some decency to pay first since I'm going broke.

"Thank you."

"So, you're a college student. You look matured." He told me.

"Really? I'm actually just eighteen. Hope I didn't disappoint you."

"No, no. I'm not that old myself. I'm 23 and I just started working in a bank. I presume you're bored that's why you agreed to meet me?" I hate men like this one. He's trying to act out like a nice guy but he's not. He's twisted just like me and I can feel it. I need to find my other twisted half.

"Yeah. I have nothing to do. I'm done with exams and all." I took a bite of newly grilled ribs and yes, Checo's ribs are amazing as always. I took another bite and I felt myself getting warmer. I finally was able to eat real food from all that stress I had to go through. Saving money is difficult so I have to make sure I put all the money I receive in my secret bank account.

Secret? Yes. I am actually planning on moving to New York after I graduate. I don't wanna go back to a suburban nightmare where we live. I can't go back to that place after all these good things that keep on happening to me.

"Can we hang out at your place?" I asked him.

"Sure." He said and yes, you can say I that I acted like the damn slut I am. I probably will meet him again for some ribs and action. He asked for my number and we've been texting. He texted me goodnight just five minutes ago.

I got myself a twisted half. Maybe my twisted half. I still fantasize a guy kike that. Someone who's so good on the outside but undeniabky wicked when he's with me. That's the kind I want.

Love, Nina