Chapter 14.

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Leyla

"Beti," my grandma says throwing her arms around me. I hug her back tightly, not wanting to let her go. Ever since my parents died she has been the only person I can talk too. In short she is like my second mother. I feel tears pricking my eyes and try to fight them back. If I cry my grandma will worry something is wrong and I don't want that, I just want to talk to her and get her advice.
"Beti?" My grandma pushes me back anxiety rolling off her tongue. I smile sadly and take a seat at the table in the coffee house. The waitress comes to take our order and when she sets down the two coffees I can't stand the tension anymore.
"How do you know when you're in love?" I ask wrapping my cold hands around my mug. It's early January and the air is still crisp even though the coffee house has it's 'heating' on.
"Leyla?" My grandmother furrows her eyebrows and I sigh. I explain my whole situation to her: the fake engagement, the anger over the ungrateful comment, the 'kiss' (nothing more), the avoidance, the admission.
"How do you know it's love?" I finish feeling a tear trickle down my cheek. I wipe it away quickly.
"Beti," my grandma reaches a hand across the table squeezing my fingers, "love is when you look into someone's eyes and see their heart. Love is when two people touch each other's souls. Love is knowing someone's weaknesses and not taking advantage of them. Love is making a commitment to an imperfect person without judgement. Leyla you may think you don't know what love is, but deep down in your heart there is a feeling called love waiting to be let out. I know you miss your parents because you love them. I know you miss me because you love me. I know you secretly love this Rahul Khanna because when you say his name I see that same Leyla I once saw when you were ten years old. Fresh faced, bubbly and coming to terms with your life. Don't make the mistake I made Leyla. I let you go because I thought I couldn't fight for you, don't let Rahul Khanna go because you think you can't fight for him. Your mother fought hard for everything in life, she fought for your father, fought for you, fought for me... You have a little bit of your mother in you Leyla all you need to do is let her out so she can fight for what's right. Because love... is the ability to let those who care for you see the deepest scars. Don't live regretting your life Leyla, else you'll never be happy or free." I stare into my coffee watching the bubbles swirl around the mug. I used to be so happy, so free, so adventurous and then I let one thing effect me so much that I decided to change my way of living. I can't live making the same mistakes over and over again.
"I love him," I mumble feeling tears well in my eyes, "I really love him." I close my eyes and I see his face. His face when I told him I can't love him, his face when I told him to leave, his face when he told me he loved me.
"Then go Leyla," my grandma whispers, "before you let this form into a mistake too."

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