Crazy In Love With You || (n.j.)

~9~

"We're leaving tomorrow, right?" I asked Mrs. Jonas as her and I were sitting at the kitchen counter and drinking coffee. The boys and their dad were off at the shooting range today, and so it was just the two of us.

"That's correct. Nick has been telling me how excited he is to be going with you. You truly do make his life better." I smiled. I know for a fact that he made my life better every single day.

"Well, he makes my life worth living." Of course, I've never told him this. Or anyone. The Jonas family did know that once in my senior year of high school, I tried to kill myself. I was so done with my life. My mother was ignoring me, I haven't had a father since I was eleven years old. Now I was almost eighteen. She pulled me in for a hug, rubbing my back up and down slowly. As I listened to her heart beat, I calmed down before I started to get worked up.

"Anyway, we should get packing." She said to me, and I agreed. I made my way to my room, getting my suitcase from under the bed. I opened it, and began packing for Hawaii. We were all going on a family vacation, and I was so excited. Today was mine and Nick's one year anniversary, and he told me he had something planned for us.

It took me a few hours to completely pack. We were staying there for five days, and I planned to make the most of them.

"Audrey, honey, Nick would like to see you out on the deck." Denise came and told me. I left my stuff on the floor, and went to the back deck. I saw Nick sitting in a chair, watching the sunset. I stepped out of the patio door, and he looked over to me, standing up.

"Hello to you too." I giggled after he gave me a deep kiss.

"Happy anniversary." He said to me, only inches between our lips. I felt his breath on me, and I could smell his cologne.

"Happy anniversary babe." I smiled, and be picked me up bridal style, bringing me to the backyard. A table was set up, with dinner. I stared at the setup in awe as he pulled my chair out for me. He sat across from me, and our magical night began.

After dinner, Nick and I hung out in his room and I just watched him pack his suitcase. I was planning on saying to him what I said to Denise today. We hadn't told him about what happened with me, because he wasn't home when it happened. Also, we figured it might be best if we didn't. I was going to now, with the okay of his mother.

"Can I...uh...tell you something hun?" I asked him, and he looked up at me from his place on the floor. I adjusted my position on the bed, and could feel my pulse begin to race. I patted the spot next to me, so I knew that I had his undivided attention. He sat next to me and I took a deep breath. This was going to hard for me to do.

"Do you remember the day before my birthday last year?" He nodded and my voice became shaky, but I tried my best to steady it.

"And you were gone...getting my birthday present," I paused, swallowing hard.

"So I was home with the rest of your family. Well, as you know, I was going through a really rough time....and I've dealt with these rough times throughout my life before. But this time was so different. I...I felt like I was invading your home...then I was second guessing all of my decisions," I paused again. I saw Denise standing outside the door, and thankfully his back was toward the door. She gave me a smile of sympathy, and I continued.

"I had some pills for my anxiety. As you know. And so I tried to....take more then I was supposed to. Lucky for all of us, your mom found me as I was trying to open the bottle. She saved my life. I remember, before I tried to open the bottle, thinking about you. How crushed you'd be, but I didn't care at the time. A little while after that happened, I'd look to the bottle, and think how easy it'd be to just run away from my problems. But you came to my mind...and I knew I couldn't leave you."

I knew that the story sounded sappy, and probably like I wanted him to feel sorry for me, but I feel like he deserved to know. I looked at the expression that was frozen on his face. It was a look of sadness, but also apology. I only embraced him in a hug, and he whispered in my ear.

"I am so, so sorry Audrey. So sorry."

"It's okay. You make my life worth living." I said, my chin on his shoulder. A few tears escaped the corners of my eyes, and Denise walked away. He pulled away from the hug, and I played with my hands.

"You're okay now though?"

"Yes. I'm better then okay. I'm great." I gave him a weak smile, leaning into his chest. He kissed the top of my head, his arms around my middle. The both of us fell asleep in the silence of the room.

"Wake up," Nick's voice said in my ear. I only groaned and pushed him away, curling into a ball. I didn't want to get up.

"You can sleep on the plane baby." He spoke softly, rubbing my back in circles. I yawned and stretched, rolling over. I opened one eye to look at him, and he was ready to go.

"We're going to Hawaii." I sleepily smiled. I was screaming in excitement on the inside, but my body didn't want to move at all.

"Hawaii!!" Frankie ran through the hallway, screaming. I heard people talking downstairs, so I must've been the last one to wake up. Nick helped me out of bed and I kissed him lazily before going into my own room. I changed into comfy clothes for a long flight, and zipped my suitcase. Once I was ready, we were all off to the airport.